Aroace thoughts/rants

Why can't I feel it

Around every corner
Over every mountain
Across every ocean
The soft and beautiful melody to every song
In every book carved into the pages
In every story brought to life on every screen
Whispered into the crisp air
It's everywhere

It's not fair
If only I could climb
If only I could swim
If only I could hear, and read, and see
If only I could feel what's in the air
Then maybe, I would fit in when the topic inevitably turns to "love"

It's not that I don't have love
I have love
Love for my family
Love for my friends
Love for how the sky turns pink when the sun begins to set
Love for my fuzzy blanket that makes me feel at home

But not love for the way people look at each other like that
Not love for the way their hands lingers, holding on too each other for so long
Not love for true loves kiss
Not love for a Prince Charming
Not love for others being in love

But that's what the world was made for
Everyone is dancing to the same song,
Holding each other and swaying
In love
And I can't even hear the melody
Or even feel the vibrations of the instruments
I can't feel any of it.
Not for myself.
Or anyone.

I'd be fine not feeling it for myself.
But I wish I could feel it for others
I wish I could watch two people look at each other like that,
And not roll my eyes
Not get annoyed
Not hate it.
I don't care if I don't have a Prince Charming
But why can't my heart melt when I see others get their Prince Charming

It's not jealousy,
Is it?
I don't want a Prince Charming,
And it's not that I don't want others to have one either,
Maybe it's just I'm tired of that being the words to every book,
The story to every movie,
The lyrics to every song,

Maybe I just want a break from it
But there's nowhere to run from it
No where to hid
It's everywhere.
And I can't escape.

If this was a fairy tale I guess I'd be the villain
Because in fairytales it's always the villain who doesn't believe in love

Why can't I feel it 
I just want to feel it
And not feel bothered by it,

I actually wrote this a few days ago but wanted to post the bored together thing first since it was the albums 2nd birthday. Anyway thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed. Wishing you all a beautiful day/night 💚💜