Hi, I'm aroace and some things around romance culture make my brain hurt ????
If you're aroace you might relate to some of this or maybe not. Idk. I just need to do something with these thoughts before they consume me
Includes:
Thoughts
Rambles
Ra...
Sometimes it really not only baffles me but lowered kinda hurts my soul a tiny bit that there's this idea with true love and finding your own true love who is supposed to be your favorite person.
Like part of me thinks it's so sweet how out of billions of people in the world people can have one favorite, but it also kinda hurts. Because how can they have a favorite out of everyone they love. And this isn't just with romance, this is with everything.
Like how can you date someone and that person be your favorite when you have an amazing family and friends. Or how can you be apart of a trio of friendships/found family but one be your favorite friend. How can you have a favorite cousin
It makes me feel bad I guess because what if someone has a favorite person, but they aren't their favorite person's favorite person? Like that....that hurts me. Like, how can I word this in a simpler way, what if lets say this random person let's call them Polly. Polly's favorite person is Mary, but she's not Mary's favorite person. Mary's favorite person his Cris. Like, now I feel bad for Polly.
Or what if Mark Steve and Tom are all three best friends for life, Steve loves both Tom and Mark, they are both is favorite people. But Tom and Mark each have a love interest they "love more" or Mark and Tom are each other's favorite persons and poor Steve thought he was a part of that but he actually wasn't.
Why do we do heavily focus on the does that we need to have one favorite person. I mean if you do and you are each other's favorite person then that's great I guess. I don't know.
But I could never say I had one best friend in elementary school, I didn't wanna hurt anyone's feelings.
Even know, my siblings, my friends, I can't say I have one favorite person between them. They all are. My siblings are my family I've known them forever and they're my family. My friends are pretty much like my family and I love them so much.
I guess I can't chose a favorite person, so I make everyone my favorite person. Maybe I'm adored I'm no one's favorite person so I have as many favorite people as I can so they can be someone's favorite person, even if I'm not theirs.
Seriously why are we so focused on pairs.
I was looking at my wall just now and (here comes a mini Jatp rant) I got this coloring book for Christmas like almost 2 years ago and it had the iconic hotdog scene. (If you don't know Jatp, this is the scene when 3 of the main characters die, they become ghosts it's the whole plot of the show basically, but they die from eating these streetdogs, the 3 of them. There's 3) they had that picture in the book. And...my love, the one character I would actually die for....like "I have many favorite people" if he was real he'd be my favorite person I'm sorry. (That not true my friends and family would still be my favorite, but he is very near and dear to my heart, we know I'm talking about Reggie) Reggie delivers one of the most iconic lines in the entire show in this scene. Also not to mention he's a main character and in this scene.... But for some STUPID AND IDIOTIC REASON whatever ignorant sack of stupid person made the coloring book, DIDNT PUT HIM IN THIS PHOTO!!??
Like excuse you!? This was 2 years ago and it still makes me so mad. Before I colored a single stroke in that book drew Reggie myself on a separate piece of paper, tore out the other paper and connected them. It looks terrible. The paper doesn't math my art study doesn't math and it's not proportional. Sometimes I look at it and I feel glad I did that, that I drew Reggie but sometimes like right now I look at it and makes me so mad they cropped him out like that.
They are a trio. And to top it off Reggie's barely in any of the pages.
Like sometimes it gives the vibes of "their a trio" but like "in every trio there's a duo" and Reggie's the one left out which is like so unfair it would be if any of them were left out but one I'm bias and super protective of Reggie but also Reggie doesn't have any one else in the show besides those too and then Julie. Unless you count Ray who can't even see or hear him, I mean I love Reggie and Ray and wanted more of them sure but their relationship was still one sided which is kinda sad like,
I don't know I guess it's just one of those days where I'm super upset about this stuff.
And it only makes it worse when people automatically assume two people are each other's favorite people just because their dating. Or like your favorite person has to be your significant other. Like more than my mom? More than my siblings? More than my two best friends? No. If I marry anyone it'll be one of those two best friends and we'd do it for financial reasons (or it could be someone I meet who becomes a best friend but as of rn I only have 2 so...) But that'll never happen because the two fiends I have want a boyfriend.
So yeah. Kinda sucks when you're no one's favorite person but it's okay. I am my own favorite person (that not even try most of the time I hate myself but you know what it's fine)
Anyways that's all I have to say so thanks for listening to me ramble sorry if there's a lot of typos in this I was typing really fast and might have missed something when editing anyways that's all. Wishing you all a fabulous day/night. Take care 💚💜
Edit: Here's the photo. I colored the whole thing and drew Reggie because they do rudely excluded him. I might re do it tho because I wanna use paper that matches better. And my art is hopefully better.
Also I hope this is loading for you guys, for me it's showing up as a blank white photo but I hope it loads for you.
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