Aroace thoughts/rants

Friendship Bracelet

SHUT UP.
I'm gonna cry.
I found THE song.

Okay to be fair I have yet to hear the whole thing. It's called Friendship Bracelet and I added it to my playlist because I thought it would be a cute song about friendship. So I am listening to music while I right my story I notice this song is playing and I'm excited to hear it but I'm still writing so I am not fully paying attention and all of a sudden I hear:

"It's just I loved you first"

That. That got me paying attention.

The song never explicitly says it's a romantic partner that is replacing the best friend but it doesn't say it's a best friend either (but there is one lyric that hints at a romantic partner "you don't want me to write you a wedding speech. Feels more like a eulogy for you and I" IM SORRY.  Who told you you could make me cry!?)

So yeah. This song made me stop writing dead in my tracks. Because I gotta talk about it. I'll be honest I first started listening to it and I'm like "eh. It's whatever not sure I like it" now I'm like it's my life. It's my everything.

The "it's just I loved you first" really sends me 😭
Like how people chose a romantic love with someone they recently meet over their childhood best friend or something. Like!!

"it's just I loved you first" I'll never get over that.

I'm not okay.

"A happy ending I believed. I kinda miss it" like why can't happily ever after exist in friendship form too 🥺 (it does. Just not as often. But that's why I'm gonna be an author. Happily Ever After platonic edition. Oh wait that gives me a story idea....)

Anyways back to the song. "We were growing old alone together. That's what you wanted till you wanted something better" (I'm going with the the best friend ditched her for a romance) like why is romance "better" 🥺 like I feel this so much. Like the best friend "wanted something better" but like she didn't have to ditch her friend.

"I'm not bitter. I'm happy you're happy. It's just I loved you first. And it's not like it was easy but we had each other now you have another and I hate it I hate it so go ahead and burn my friendship braclet" like this is technically a rage song...but the lyrics be hitting the sad spot. Like the beat is rage but the lyrics man 😭

"But we had each other. Now you have another" Don't do that to me. What happened to we always have each other! (Sorry it's my fav Reggie quote. Some how Jatp still squeezed it way into my thoughts lol)

But yeah like this is such a feeling. When my friends are in a relationship and it's good and they're happy I'm like cool I'm glad you're happy, but like I loved them first!

I'll never get over the lyric "it's just I loved you first"

And then 
"I'm trying to be happy you're happy" the switch up from I'm happy you're happy to I'm TRYING to be happy you're happy! Because it's hard!! It's hard to see the person you feel like you can't be happy without be happy without you.
Damn. That's a quote I have to put in my book or something.

Anyways. It's hard.

And right after that it's "I just wish I knew you'd go and replace me. Thought we'd have each other."

ANOTHER SWITCH UP. From "we had each other" fact. "THOUGHT we had each other" did they even have each other from the start? 😭

And the whole replace thing.
I don't wanna be replaced.

I think this song just called me out on my deep fear.

I'm still not over the "it's just I loved you first" because like it's sad and raging at the same time.

I need to get back to writing my story. 

I added this song to my playlist inspired by the book I'm writing. Thinking it would be a cute friendship song to go with Rue and Reggie. It still works with my story, just not with Rue and Reggie because none of them would replace or abandon the other.

So yeah. This song. It's...it might just show up on my Spotify wrapped 2024 and I'm scared because Jeremy Shada dominates my wrapped and if my favorite songs by him get beat out by this I'll be sad.

Omg I totally glossed over the "you don't want me to write you a wedding speech. Feels more like a eulogy for you and I"

Eulogy is like a speech for someone who died. THEIR FRIENDSHIP DIED 😭 the wedding was the death of their friendship 💔
Again, who gave this artist permission to make me cry.

I need to write. If I want to get published I have to write my story so I'm gonna stop crying over a random song and write my epic friendship story.

Goodnight, Good day, thanks for listening and take care 💚💜