Aroace thoughts/rants

Poem

So I already put this poem on here but I revised and changed it. I'd like your critical opinion on this because I think I might submit it to this contest my school is doing called play and play write or something idk but I write a short story or poem and if I win they perform it on stage. I thought about writing a short story but I don't know if I'll have time so I took this poem I already wrote changed it up some to make it better and maybe I'll submit it to the contest idk I'm scared bc like if I win that's scary bc then my thoughts will be out there.

Anyways. Here it is.

You were beautiful
You were wonderful
You were a dream
You made me cry
You are everything.

You made me happy.
You make me sad
You make me mad
You are a nightmare.
You make me sob.
You were everything.

They say healing is moving on
Didn't you have a similar message?
The way you handled the theme for grief
And healing
I was grieving too when we first met
I thought I could ignore my grief
I thought you magically healed it
But you just distracted me from it
And like the poem I read in English class said "nothing gold can stay"
Robert Frost was right. Gold leaves.

You were gold
And you had to leave.
It was getting old,
Everything was about you
Even after you left

And all of the sudden I wasn't just grieving from before you
I was grieving everything

You saved me
But you also ruined me.
I hate that you know
Because you didn't ruin me
You're perfect
It's my own faults that made me ruined
My own faults that ruined the way you made me feel

I know I should move on
Move past you
Most would by now
It's been over 2 years since you were stripped away
Yet here I stay
Right at the same spot

Over a year since we've really talked
And it feels like an eternity
I can't think of you how I used to
Most would have moved on by now, certainly
But how can I when I can't stop thinking about you
Involving myself with you
I say it's time to move on
But you still own a piece of my heart
I always want you to
I hold on instead of moving on
Because you are too important to let go

Holding on it like clutching a hot rod,
But holding on is the only thing keeping me from falling.
Falling into a blazing fiery pit.
Bit by bit holding on burns my flesh
But letting go would burn me worse

So yea. That's all. Thanks for listening , and I hope you all have a wonderful day/night. Wishing you the best, take care 💚💜