Choni One Shots pt: 2

359: The One With The Box

TONI POV:

Cheryl and I are in our bedroom. I'm sitting on my bed reading a comic book because I am 12 apparently, Cheryl's reorganizing the closet. We're just bored and I don't have anything to hide from her. "What's this?" Cheryl asks as she pulls out a box. Except that. "Ah! Please don't look through that." I say sitting up in my bed. She looks at me. "What? Is it a bunch of dildos or something?" She ask putting it on my bed. "No. It's-." She interrupts me. "Drugs? Alcohol? Both? All three of what I said?" She ask smiling. She opens it. "It was the stuff from my sisters room that a raided before our parents and friends went through it after she died." I tell her. "You had a sister?" I nod sitting back. "Yeah. I haven't looked through this since I took the stuff and put them in there." I say quietly. "What's this?" She ask pulling out a piece of paper. I grab it from her hands. "You really can't look at that." I say frantically. "Why?" She ask quietly. "It's an unsent letter to her ex boyfriend." I say quietly. "It's the 21st century." She says quietly. "Yeah. She never meant to given to him." I say awkwardly. She nods. "Can I go through this?" She ask quietly. "Yeah." I say quietly. "Except those too." I say pulling out an envelope. "What's that?" She ask quietly. "Her nudes." I say quietly. "We looked a lot a like so just picture me but a little darker and taller." I tell her. She nods. "Nothing else that's off limits?" I shake my head. "It's mostly just stuff my parents would have a heart attack if they saw. Or stuff I wanted." I tell her. "Oh!" She smiles. "What was her name?" She ask quietly. "Jessica." I say quietly. "You got Antoinette and she got Jessica?" She ask quietly. "My parents weren't expecting her." She nods. "You're older?" I nod. "Oldest kid." I say quietly. "It was just us." I tell her. "Why haven't you told me a lot of this stuff?" She ask quietly. "She died very suddenly and young. I haven't fully come to terms with it." I tell her. She looks at me. "How long ago did she die?" She ask quietly. "She was a Junior and we were freshmen in college." I tell her. She nods. "So like 4 years ago." I nod. "I was away at college when I got the call." I tell her. "How did she die?" She ask quietly. "She killed herself." I tell her. "She was abused by her ex boyfriend." I say quietly. "Is that what that's about?" She ask motioning to the letter. "Some other stuff too." I say quietly. "What?" She ask quietly. I look at her. "Cher..." I shake my head. "I can't say." I whisper. She nods. "Sorry." I look at the letter Jessica wrote. I found it in a book she had. It talks about she doesn't forgive her ex, he got her pregnant and she had an abortion and never stopped thinking about it. I think that's what caused her to kill herself. I want to kill him. He ruined her life. "Toni! Toni!" I look at Cheryl. "Yeah?" I ask her. "You spaced out." She tells me. "Sorry. This has brought back a bunch of memories I don't want to unlock." I say picking stuff up and putting it in the box. I get up and put it in the closet. "I'm sorry." She tells me. "Don't be! It was a little nice going though it!" I tell her. "We've been together for 3 years. I just wish you told me." I nod. "I know. I wasn't ready." I tell her. She nods.

I walk into Jessica's room. "Do you have an idea on where her phone could be?" Mom ask quietly. I shake my head. "No, but I'll keep an eye out for it." I lie. I know exactly where it is. "Do you mind if I go through everything before you and dad and get what I want first?" I ask her. "Yeah! I'll leave you to it." She says before walking out. I close the door and lock it. "What have you left behind?" I whisper. I grab a box she had, it's empty. I put it on the bed. I take a deep breath. I look at her stuffed. I slowly go through her stuff and grab stuff my parents will drop dead if they see it and some stuff I just want like some of her clothes. I sit down on the floor and reach my hand under her nightstand. I feel around until I feel her phone. I pull it out, it's dead. "I'll look through this later." I whisper. I get up and go to her books and look through them. I find a envelope and slowly open it. I see a letter telling her ex boyfriend about how he raped her. "Holy shit." I whisper.

I sit up in the bed and catch my breath. I grab my chest panicking. "Toni! What's wrong?" Cheryl ask sitting up. "I can't- I can't breathe." I say scared. She cups my cheek and I look at her. "I can't-." I whisper. She rubs my back. "Breathe with me." She tells me. She slowly takes a deep breath and I struggle to breathe. We slowly breathe together for a few minutes. Until I start to calm down. "What happened?" She ask concerned. "I think us going through her stuff rehashed memories and caused me to have a dream about her." I tell her. "I'm sorry." I whisper. "Don't be!" She looks at me. "It comes back to me every once in a while unprovoked. It's not your fault." I tell her. "I don't want to talk about it." I whisper. "I have nightmares about Jason." She says quietly. "I get it. It's ok if you need to talk." I nod. "I know. I don't want to get into right this right now. It's late." She nods. "Let's go back to sleep then." I nod and lie down. I toss and turn for a minute. "I can't sleep." I say quietly. "Wanna go downstairs and watch tv?" She ask quietly. "Yeah." We get up and go downstairs. We sit on the couch and watch tv. I look at the tv as I keep thinking about Jessica. I feel my breathing get harder and harder. I sit up. "What's wrong?" Cheryl ask quietly. "I need some fresh air." I whisper before standing up and walking outside.