Sons Of Anarchy [Collection]

Not Now [Happy Lowman]

Kids aren't necessarily a turn off for [Y/N], it's just she isn't fully ready to have kids. So when Happy brought up having a child the first time she shut the idea down fast, but in a nice way. However, when he brought it up he second time around she folded and began to wean herself off her birth control. The first hot and heavy night the two of them share causes [Y/N] to have a panic attack.

However, as soon as she gets her first period after that night it's like a heavy weight is lifted off of her. Against her better judgement she immediately picks back up where she left off with her birth control. With her conscious clear she still continues to have those hot and heavy nights with Happy, but with added protection. From time to time she would get this overwhelming guilty feeling for not telling Happy, but she wasn't ready for kids.

Now, Happy tends to be a very observant person when it comes to the club, but when it comes to his Old Lady he's like a hawk. So when he notices the sudden appearance of a new medicine bottle in the cabinet over the sink he begins investigating and soon stumbles onto her dirty little secret.

Happy waits patiently for [Y/N] to get home from town to confront her about the situation, in reality he'd rather her be upfront and honest about it. As soon as she walks into the house with an arm full of groceries he rushes to her and pulls most of them away from her and the two of them quickly put them away.

"Sorry it took me so long at the market, there was such a long line it was crazy." [Y/N] mumbles as she puts a few things into the cabinets above the stove. Happy sets the bottle down on the counter next to her and she freezes on the spot as her eyes land on the bottle.

"When were you going to tell me?" He questions as he walks over to the kitchen table where he takes a seat on one of the chairs. She hesitates for a moment before scooping the bottle up with her hand and turning towards him, at first she can't make eye contact with him, but she does.

Guilt floods her face as she looks at the very obvious hurt look on his face, "I-I was going to, but it's not an easy subject to bring up since you desperately want kids Hap."

Happy scoffs before looking down at his lap, "Let's be honest [Y/N], do you just not want to have kids period or do you just not want to have MY kids?"

The question catches [Y/N] off guard and the bottle of birth control pills slips from her hand and clatters against the floor. A mix of emotions washes over her all at once, and she has to close her eyes tightly in order to keep from breaking down in front of him. She takes a few deep breaths as soon as she feels the tears begin to prick at her eyes and finally she looks up and over at him.

"No Happy, I do want to have kids, your kids." she replies, her voice cracking and her bottom lip quivering ever so slightly, "but not right now. I just don't think i'm in the right place to be raising a tiny you or a tiny me."

"Then just be upfront and honest with me [Y/N], I don't want to force you into something you're not comfortable with." Happy says softly while beckoning her over to sit in his lap. Begrudgingly she walks over to him and flops down on his lap and he wraps his arms around her and pulls her close before kissing her cheek.

"I'm sorry Hap, I'm slowly learning how to be more open." [Y/N] replies softly as he caresses her arms in a comforting manner.

"I know." he mumbles as the two of them continue to sit there for a while just enjoying each other's company.