Might as Well Face it, You're Addicted to Love (Joe Perry/Nikki Sixx)

Chapter 135: 10 Years Since Our Forever Part 2

God, the MOMENT I saw Nikki at our 10th anniversary wedding vow renewal? My honeybee being led by our oldest daughter & Nikki's eldest twin.... The breath left my body, my jaw dropped & time STOPPED. The tears came from my honeybee & I; I'd never seen a more beautiful sight. If I had to attempt to describe it further, it's like being struck repeatedly by lightning which is how I feel and have always felt like looking at Nikki. The day was perfect, everything from the weather to the setting, a moment/day I'd dreamed of for years. A Dream come to life, but truly THAT is MY Nikki. That is also my children and then it became my grandchildren......but ah yes, I believe my husband left off last time of the moment we caught sight of one another.... now, on with the show....

Nikki is moving towards me, being led by our eldest daughter: Josephine. I can't breathe and right now I don't care, all I see is him. The way his gravity defying mane sways gently in the breeze, those green eyes I love so well GLOWING even thru the sheen of tears, those soft angular features.... damn, I mean damn.

I feel such emotion; I can't find the words to describe how I feel right now if I tried. All I know is the other half of my soul....and now he's reached me, Josephine placing her mother's hands in mine, taking Nikki's bouquet and hugging us both. Her looking SO much like Nikki and oh her words......hit my honeybee and I hard in a good way.

"Dad, Mom.... I just wanted to say. How much I love both and how proud of you both I am, proud to be your daughter. Today is very special just like the both of you and how you love each other, Happy Anniversary." God, she sounds and looks SO grown up! My little girl isn't quite so little anymore, but I will remember her words & this day forever. I know Nikki feels the same way, the same way.

Nikki and I manage to choke out how much we love her, love her siblings.... speaking of which, Amara, Tony, James & Frankie must get in on the hugging action & wishing us a happy anniversary, God, I love them all so much!

Sharing this day with my children, with our family......there is nothing better, no where I'd rather be than right here, right now in this moment. Josephine now, watching her siblings, Amara helping her older sister with the triplets. The officiant begins & Nikki & I.... well once again time stops, as I caress his cheek us murmuring to one another....

Time starts again, as now I realize its time for the vows.... I take a deep breath, gently thumbing away Nikki's tears despite my own and I find the voice, the voice of my heart & soul, "Nikki....my dearest honeybee.... Where do I BEGIN? But I am gonna try, cause for you I'd do ANYTHING. 10 years ago today, I asked you to marry me & we married on the same day. You were expecting our first child.... for the first time in my life, I could see a future and I could see and want to share that future with only YOU. You've asked me many times; how did I know you'd say 'yes' to it all? Well, my heart knew.... YOUR heart knew. And so, for today, our 10th wedding anniversary, I wanted to give you a wedding because baby you deserve it. You Nikki-Perry Sixx deserve everything, you always have since I have known you.... Since before I have known you. These past 10 years.... We've been through heaven, we've been through hell, we've been TOGETHER. Together, we've faced what ever has come our way and got thru it & come out stronger.... Our love has grown stronger. We even before we married......the time we spent apart, the hell.... The point is, we found our way back to one another. I learned what it meant to be a partner, to want to be one, to fight for the one I love and now look where we are......surrounded by our five beyond precious children, our family. Nikki, if I regret ANYTHING it's not realizing I loved you sooner. I would suffer 1000 lifetimes, over and over to get to where we are now. I would choose YOU and only you over and over, I will save you.... always, over and over Nikki." I pause overcome for a moment and Nikki mouths to me, I got you Jo-Jo Bear. I've got you.' And I find the strength, my love gives me strength to continue....

"Honeybee...." I whisper, "I can never say what it means to me.... what you've given me, you've given me YOU. I love all of you, all parts.... you've given me five children; you've given me your heart.... just everything. And as we start this next chapter in our forever, I VOW to continue to be the husband you need, that you deserve....to be your strength when you have none, to support you....to LOVE you. I vow to be the father our children need, that they deserve....to love them and you are unconditionally. Happy 10th wedding anniversary, my dearest soul mate."

Nikki is touched, so touched and stunned.... around us I hear tears, the murmurs and awe from our children Nikki and I share and so after some moments Nikki finds his voice....and if I wasn't bawling before, I am NOW....and its fucking worth it....

"Anthony Joseph Perry......when we met twelve years ago, our first meeting wasn't a good one, but unknown to us that one night....one MOMENT would change our lives forever. Our second meeting.... well, that wasn't much better, but again.... you.... you.... did something for me....no ONE had ever done. You defended me, you.... you, stopped that MONSTER. NO ONE BEFORE YOU HAD EVER DONE THINGS JUST BECAUSE...." Nikki's voice cracks badly, and I only hold him tighter to me, to help give him strength and it does, as he calms enough to go on, "—I didn't understand too why you started to hang out with me then, I didn't see....and then the night of our first date? God, we were falling in love and neither of us knew. You were unsure then....we both were and I can never forget the night we spent together....you were tender, it didn't hurt.....and then that night terror, I decked you twice and you were unsure of what you were doing, but still you comforted me....still you didn't leave....and then things went to hell, I let you go...realized I was in love, didn't feel good enough and STILL you wrote a song for me, still you fought for me & you saved my life and I wouldn't be ALIVE today if it wasn't for you Joe, my absolute hero. Our children.... wouldn't be here. And then 10 years ago, you married me......blew me away, still does and like you.... I could only see a future at your side. We've weathered such storms these past 10 years and I only have fallen more and more for you, and how I feel about you.... I mean, how lucky am I? You always surprise me, always go above and beyond because you WANT to and I in turn want to do the same. And look.... our children, you gave me them...saved THEIR lives and saved mine. And they are the greatest expression of our love, the most beautiful....and Joe? As we start this new chapter of our lives......as we renew our vows, our love....US, I vow to continue to be your honeybee, to be the husband you deserve.... You need, to see you smile, to be your everything. I love you Joe, God do I love you."

With that we are pronounced husband and husband once more and we come together in a kiss, a kiss that lasts the sweetest and most beautiful eternities before we rather reluctantly part for breath.....and then we are surrounded by our children, us sharing a moment as a family....Tony, James and Frankie clinging to our legs, Josephine and Amara wrapping their arms around us.......and I kiss Nikki's eyes and thank god we're together, because every moment I spend with him, with our family is a moment I treasure, always will.

I could spend my life in this sweet surrender....in THIS moment for all the rest of time.... Happy Anniversary my most beloved husband, the mother of my children....my everything: Nikki Perry Sixx.

A/N: A beautiful ceremony and vow renewal, and there is much more to come. There will be at least 2 more parts, so stay tuned for those chapters. And before I forget, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays for those who celebrate!