Might as Well Face it, You're Addicted to Love (Joe Perry/Nikki Sixx)

Chapter 168: Awake at Last Part 2 (Josephine Nicole Perry)

"---We can't lie, it REALLY hurt. We thought we were gonna lose you Josephine, lose our baby. As a parent, you're always at the back of your mind prepared to go first. Still, we know why you did it and honey that took a hell of a lot of guts and THANK YOU." Dad continues, as I feel him and mom both squeeze my hand tighter. And once more dad practically whispers sobbing after a moment, "----They got you in surgery to remove the second bullet." He closes in his eyes a moment before continuing, "The first had been a bad graze on your arm...but surgery they nearly lost you....and you lost SO much blood that they didn't think you'd make it thru the night......" Dad can't go on, Mom he isn't doing much better & surprisingly or maybe not Amara DOES.......

"J-Josey.... It was your b-birthday, that n-night.... all night, mom...dad.... Everyone, talked to you all night. It...It helped Daddy said....and...it did.... You made it through the night, winning your first major battle. You're just like momma, you don't know how to quit." My sister's face clouds in pain, in the memories & I wish to God I had the strength to hug her right now. "----I...I thought I killed you.... I went back for you Josey. I couldn't stop it.... you almost died in my arms. I felt and have felt so helpless and lost without you and I...."

I Cut her off & hold her with my words & she is knowing what I'd wish to do takes my hands and place them on her face hold them. "----I know...Amara, I can only truly imagine. One of us is hurt, we all hurt. I can hear it; it's NOT your fault what happened to me. You didn't kill me; you did everything you could I know. I would do the same for you, for our parents...our sisters & brothers & everyone that I love. Then again, it's easier said than done. I need you to know, I would save you over & over Amara Rain. That all this was worth it, because you LIVED.... because our parents...those we care about are alive. And you would have done the same, for any one of us. Sides, like mom & dad have always said....'No matter where I'm at in the world, I will find my way back to you.' We are not alone in this; it will take a long time, but we will get there. Doesn't make it hurt any less, and I feel so much like you." I pause a moment, taking in her & I feel more than I see my brothers & Sisters...and our parents. "---You.... Amara.... I...." I stammer looking back to our parents before managing to get out slowly, "----when I... 'Died' or was...I saw you.... I saw our parents. It was like I was watching a movie, only it wasn't. It was SO strange, I felt fear.... saw it, but you TOLD me to hold on to Amara not go. They tried to drag you away, you fought them. I saw mom.... dad, nearly collapsed desperate to help me, but they couldn't. I was almost gone the first time.... i heard dad say, 'JOSEPHINE NICOLE PERRY......we're here.... Your Ma & I are here. PLEASE honey, don't leave us!' I'm not sure what was going on, but I did at the same time." I look around and I see all the sets of eyes belonging to my parents & siblings go as wide as they can go & this brings on even more tears.

"I KNEW.... oh sweetheart. THANK YOU for telling us." Dad chokes out.

"Dying like seriously freaking hurts.... but it was worth it.... saving the ones I love." Quietly. Despite having been in a coma for a month & just woken up, I am exhausted & drained to say the least, but I push past it. I NEED my family right now, and sleep scares me......

What if I don't wake back up? I hate putting my family thru this....and finally I am wondering where STORM is?!....

Mom's voice breaks thru.... his voice a soothing balm despite the tinge of fear because I am him in female form, SO of course he KNOWS....

"I see it honey....'what if I don't wake back up?' sleep terrifying you and you hate feeling like you're hurting us, us going thru this. I admit, I am scared for you to sleep. I know you're dad is too, we all are but hey let's get this right.... You've won another MAJOR battle here, you WOKE. And you're just like me, you don't know how NOT to keep going.... You'll come back to us. And I know too you wanna be with everyone, you ARE. You're still healing....AND Storm is with family. She misses you so much of course, and gotta tell you......we've been letting her sleep with your 'bee-bee', it makes her feel like you're with her. Now sleep Josephine and before you DO, think of the things and people you love. I know you will."

He is SO right....so right, its gonna take a long time to heal in all ways.... but I am not alone. Still before I go to sleep.... i feel I NEED to talk or say something to Tony, James, & Frankie as well....and of course somehow, I know Storm can hear me too....

"I am glad I could help Storm..." I begin quietly, slowly and of course ever tearful, "But momma.... Dad.... I wanna talk to Tony, James & Frankie. I feel I need to."

"Ok..." Softly, "We could never deny you anything." Dad says. And left unspoken for you don't always need words is, 'You're just like your ma and I love that.'

I turned to look at Tony, James, and Frankie. "—I know this has been hard on you guys. I've missed your smiles...making me laugh and taking care of you. I just have missed everything. I love you three so much, so much and I would do the same for you as I did Amara, cause that's what family does."

They carefully hug me, echo, they love me & that says it all to me. I feel hugs from Amara, hands smooth back my hair.... kisses to my forehead & I give into sleep.... dreaming....

I feel so LOST....out of control, having a panic attack & I seem to be in a place that I love or loved....a place so familiar, and I think sometime has passed since I almost died saving my sister's life....but I feel scared, all alone in a corner and I think NO ONE can reach me till I FEEL someone that at first scares me....but he, he grounds me....somehow he grounds me.

"Love, you're having a bad panic attack....and I KNOW just what that's like. I promise I won't hurt you. You feel lost, scared....in a place or trapped in memories of your own trauma." His voice sounds oddly familiar & my gut tells me this stranger for some reason UNDERSTANDS and won't hurt me. "---My name is Hunter, Hunter Freddie Mercury. I am the son of Queen's Freddie Mercury & Brian May. I've been kidnapped as a baby, and a little kid may not be the same as you but that FEELING you know. And then there's never making any real friends, cause everyone wants a bloody piece of you but not the real you. It's hard to trust people I know. You darling need to breathe ok.... I'm not leaving till I know you're ok."

After some time......I calm, trusting this.... well not stranger, stranger and I find myself staring into dark eyes & features that resemble or are a dead ringer for.... WOW, He said he's Freddie Mercury's son? He REALLY DOES look like him, except he has what looks like Brian May's lips & Curly dark hair and.... Damn Josephine, quit staring.... but I can't. and then I start getting upset again...he shouldn't have to deal with this, with me....

"You s-shouldn't...see...me like this.... deal with this.... I mean...I thank you.... i will trust you.... that's so h-hard for me.... I'm nothing special....and I..."

Hunter, it seems cuts me off, "---I couldn't leave you alone, I felt I had to help you. I know what its like getting in your head...not trusting strangers & having no real friends sides the ones you call family. So, I get it trust me love. And that's blood bullshit, you ARE special......can I at least get a name?"

I gape at him before saying, "My name.... Is Josephine. Josephine Nicole Perry. I wish I felt like I was special.... deep down I know it's true.... but um THANK YOU." Then I voice a though unsure of how it will go, "I don't say this lightly....and I just met you.... but I hope...I mean you're the first real friend outside of my extended family I've ever had. I... I hope that's not...that, that's OK."

Hunter looks surprised but touched and looks like he is holding back tears and then he smiles, "Its MORE than ok.... It's an Honor Josephine Nicole Perry."

A/N: Josephine is beginning to heal, and she will wake again and at the end a dream or a vision of what is to come? More to come soon!