His Love Healed My Heart

INSERT 112

A WEEK LATER
WEDNESDAY
*
*
*
LWAZI
*
*
*
I know Thando is very worried about me.  My nightmares are back again and I don’t know why.  My therapist said it’s probably because I’m afraid of commitment.  I also need to tell Thando about my past, I don’t even think I’m ready for her to know. These sleepless nights are not helping either because she is always asking what’s causing the nightmares and I can’t tell her.  I can’t even tell her what they are about.
Thando:  You are up early for someone who didn’t sleep much last night
Me:  I’m fine baby.
Thando:  I am really worried about you, maybe your therapist should prescribe some sleeping pills for you.
Me:  I don’t want to be dependent on them.
Thando:  where are you going all dressed up early today?
Me:  I have a meeting at the office today, I told you about it .
Thando:  yes you did, sorry I forgot.
Me:  what’s for breakfast?
Thando:  Your favourite.  Baby sit I want to say something. (I grab a chair and sit.  She looks at me with eyes full of worry)  Lwazi I love you and I think I have proven my love for you and my loyalty to you.  I know that there’s something behind these nightmares of yours and I won’t force you to talk.  When you are ready to talk I’ll be here.  You’ve been extremely over protective lately and Lwazi I won’t lie, I am very worried about you.
Me:  I know baby and I promise when I’m ready to tell you everything I will, right now I just don’t feel ready.  I’ve tried a coulple of times but it never seems to be the right time or I never know what to say.
Thando:  there will never be a right time baby and the best way is to just say what’s on your mind.
Me:  I hear you.  Let me go to work and I’ll see you when I get back. (I kiss her and leave.  She is right though.  There will never be a right time to talk to her about this. I should try harder.  When I walk into the reception area I notice that Bandile is here with Qhawe.) And then what are you guys doing here so early in the morning?
Qhawe:  We came to see you.
Bandile:  Let’s go to your office
Me:  are you going to kill me, if you are then I need to call Thando and say my goodbyes.
Qhawe:  will you stop being childish.  (he states sitting down on the chair opposite me on my desk.  Bandile is leaning against the closed office door.)
Bandile:  are you having nightmares again?
Me:  how did you know?
Qhawe:  we know you Lwazi.  Start talking.
Me: ok fine.  The nightmares are back and Thando has notied that something is wrong and she’s going to wait for me until I’m ready to talk.
Qhawe:  Look man, I  am not going to force you to talk to her but you need to talk to her, she needs to know.  Your nightmares are probably back because you fear commitment.
Bandile:  Qhawe is right you know. 
Me:  I know guys but I just don’t know how to tell her.
Bandile:  Look we are here for you and if you need us to be around when you talk to her we can do that.  whatever it takes man otherwise this thing is going to eat you up and kill you slowly.  You love that woman, you shouldn’t be scared.  Even when you tell her she is still going to love you, she won’t runaway if that’s what you are afraid of.
Qhawe:  that’s true man.  You shouldn’t be afraid and I’m sure she is waiting for you to propose  to her.
Me:  I will but not yet though.  I need to sort this out first.  Qhawe you should also be proposing too.
Qhawe:  I’m planning to.  I was just scared that she might get tired and walk away, I expected her to do so.
Bandile:  she stayed man and on top of that she gave you five beautiful  babies.
Qhawe:  I know guys. (my office phone rings)
*****************               ********************                      **********************
Receptionist:  Sir there’s someone here to see you.
Me:  It’s fine you can send them up.  Did they say what they want
Receptionist:  He says he is looking to use our services.
Me:  Ok fine, send them up.
**********************                  ******************                    *************************

Me:  Guys I have a client coming, you’ll have to leave
Qhawe:  No problem man as long as you promise that you will take care of yourself and talk to Thando.
Me:  I will, I promise.  (Just before they walk out someone walks in)
Him:  I’m sorry I didn’t realise you had people in here. (I can see Bandile and Qhawe are shocked but not as much as I am.  I’m frozen, I can’t move, I can’t breathe, I feel trapped in my own body.  I want to run but my feet are too heavy.  I can feel the tears falling from my eyes.  I am unable to speak.  The only question going through my mind is “what the hell is he doing here?”
Qhawe:  Lwazi are you ok? (I can hear him talk but now I’m more focused on the chest pains I am feeling, my heart is beating too fast for my liking.) Bandile call an ambulance something is wrong
Bandile:  what are you doing here and how did you find him?
Him:  I came to see him..
Qhawe:  Bandile just stop with the twenty questions we can deal with that later.  Call the ambulance.  Lwazi look at me, I need you to sit.  I think you are having a heart attack.  Please man just try to calm down ok, the ambulance will be here soon.  (I look at him and I just closed my eyes)
*
*
*
LUYANDA
*
*
*
Me:  Sipho you called.
Sipho:  Yes I did. I have news for you.  Sit let’s talk
Luyanda:  so what’s up?
Sipho:  I got the info that I was waiting for.  The person who helped her pay for her fees is  Luleka Gxaji.  I looked into Luleka Gxaji and picked up that at that time she was in no position to pay for anyone’s fees as she was still studying as well.
Me:  Did you say Luleka Gxaji, are you sure about that?
Sipho:  I am absolutely sure my friend.  Why do you know her?
Me:  Just carry on
Sipho:  Ok then.  Like I said before she was in no position to pay for anyone’s fees as she was still studying at that time.  The money to pay for Sihle’s fees was transferred into her account every three months without fail and it was transferred from a certain company using Sihle’s name as the reference.  The name of the company is NJONGO CONSTRUCTIONS.
Me:  Why does that name sound familiar.  I should ask Khanyi since she also deals with construction now.
Sipho:  the company is based in the Eastern Cape maybe that’s why the name sounds familiar.
Me:  maybe, do you know who owns it?
Sipho:  Not yet.  When we find out who owns the company, then we’ll know exactly who was behind those payments.
Me:  Sihle really played me for a fool you know.  If she was not the mother of my child I would really kill her you know that.  this whole thing was planned and she was part of this plan because she was vindictive.
Sipho:  You are mumbling now.
Me:  I’m just saying what the info you’ve given me reveals.  She planned the whole thing Sipho.  She planned t take my baby from me.
Sipho:  sometimes I don’t know what drives people to do the cruel things they do to others and they expect to be forgiven just like that and expect the victim to forget.  I’m sorry man and if it was me, I would have killed her.  it wouldn’t have mattered if she is the mother of my kids, for this she deserves to die.  How the hell do you plan taking someone’s child away from them without a valid reason.
Me:  We’ll never know how other people’s minds work. 
Sipho:  Let me go. I’m meeting Sindy for lunch.  I’ll let you as soon as I have something on the company.  I’ll see you later.
S’phesihle what the hell were you thinking, I can’t believe this was actually a well though out plan. It was a perfect plan.  If it was not for Lungi insisting to know more about me and ending up in hospital in the process I would have never known that she was still alive. Lungi is going to be torn when she finds out about this.  Sihle how can yo be so cruel to your own child, nevermind me but your own child.  May her Gods have mercy on her.  I need to talk to my dad.