His Love Healed My Heart

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A MONTH LATER
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OYAMA
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My journey hasn’t been an easy one but with the support of my family and Lonwabo’s family I am getting there.  Healing is a process, a long process at it.  there are no short cuts.  I must say that I am grateful to Lonwabo, he is always there and my parents too.  Lonwabo’s siblings check on me everyday.  I think they are taking turns doing that.  I think today is one of the most difficult days in this healing journey of mine but my therapist told me it’s something I have to do in order to move on completely with my life.  Even my parents agree with the therapist but they are not coming with me today.

He has been so quiet since he drove off from my place.  I think he is just letting me be with my thoughts, I wish he would say something just to distract me.  It’s just the two of us in the car and the music is playing softly.  I know that my parents would have been there for me always but I never expected someone who barely knew me to be so invested in me.  I ask myself everyday what it means and I never get the answers I am looking for.  He brings me out of my thoughts.
Lonwabo:  we are here
Me:  ok.  thank you.
Lonwabo:  do you want me to come in with you?
Me:  No.  this is something I have to do on my own. 
Lonwabo:  I’ll wait for you here then.  Just call me if you need me to come in.
Me:  I will.  Thank you for coming with me.
Lonwabo:  I wouldn’t be anywhere else.
Me:  Let me go in.  (he walks me to the door, he holds my waist, pulls me close to him and holds me tight at the waist and whispers in my ear. 
Lonwabo:  Don’t wear this dress again especially when you come here.  (He let’s go, kisses my forehead and walks away before I could say anything, leaving me stunned and confused by what he just said. The guards let me in and sign in.  I was taken to the visitors room and I was told to wait there. I got tired of sitting, I was just too nervous, so I just decided to stand by the window while I wait. I turn around when I hear the door open and there he was, accompanied by two gaurds.  He takes a sit at one of the tables and I walk towards him and seat oposite )
Lunga:  You look amazing as usual.  To what do I owe this visit?
Me:  it’s not that I wanted to come here but I came so that I can be able to move on with my life.  I came here to tell you that  I forgive you even though you never asked for forgiveness, I forgive you. 
Lunga:  I really don’t know what you want me to say to you
Me:  I don’t want you to say anything.  There is nothing you can say me to me that would change how I feel about you.  You are a psychopath Lunga.  You don’t see anything wrong in what you did to me and those other girls. I’m not expecting an apology from you because I know I’ll never get one.  You know what’s funny about this whole thing is that I saw the signs and chose to ignore them.  Instead I chose to believe that it was your way of showing me that you love me.
Lunga:  believe it or not Oyama, out of all the girls I was with, you are the one I love and one day you will be mine.  I am going to get out of here and I am going to make you mine.
Me:  as I understand it, you are never getting out of here, you don’t even have a possibility of getting out on parole.
Lunga:  I will get out my dear and you Oyama will be mine.  Rugby boy had better enjoy himself with you while he still can.
Me:  the day you decide you come after me, is the day you sign your own death warrant.  I would tread carefully if I were you.
Lunga:  Oh please what can you do to me, nothing.  Rugby boy is also going to pay for what he did to me.
Me:  don’t test me Lunga.  Remember you are here because I stood up for myself and the other girls you raped.  You are no longer in control of my life Lunga.  I have control of my own life and I am not about to let you or the likes of you make me live my life in fear.  You are nothing to me and never will be anything to me except a nightmare that I am getting over.  Goodbye Lunga.  (I could tell that I pissed him off with the things I just said but I don’t care.  This is my life and I am owning it.  When I get outside Lonwabo was sitting on the passenger side with the door open, busy on his phone.  He looked so handsome.  My mom said I should be sure about how I feel before I tell him and make sure that I am not making him Lunga’s rebound.  I wish I knew what he was thinking when he looks at me. 
Lonwabo:  staring is rude
Me:  I’m sorry I didn’t realise I was staring.
Lonwabo:  I see.  How did it go? ( He asks as he moves from the passenger seat making way for me and he moves to the driver’s side and drives off)
Me:  I think it went well but he threatened me that when he gets out, I will be his.
Lonwabo:  he should be thankfull that he is alive.  The day he decides to lay his hands on you is the day he dies.
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SNE
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Me:  Mom can we please not do this.  This is not going to go well.
Mom:  that girl is in your shoes Sne.  You are the one that should be married to him not her.
Me:  he doesn’t want me mama.  Can we just leave it and I can’t make him want me.
Mom:  well this is the only way you can.  (she says as we get into this house)
Her:  take your shoes off and leave them by the door.  (we do as told walk in and sit on the grass mat layed out on the floor infront of this old woman.)  you shouldn’t be here.  I cannot help you
Mom:  what do you mean you cannot help me.
Her:  You came here with intention to cause harm to others and that is not how I work.  And the people you want to hurt are protected.  There is nothing you can do to them. 
Me:  what do you mean?
Her:  everything you do to hurt them will come back to you ten times more.
Mom:  How is that possible, you are said to be powerfull.
Her:  whoever is protecting them is more powerful than I am.  Even when she dies, they will remain protected.  What I am trying is that leave them alone and that is the best thing you can do for yourself.
Sne:  ma please let’s just leave them alone.  I don’t want to do this anymore. Please mama.
Mom:  How can you give up so easy
Sne:  I’m not giving up , I just don’t want to go after Mcebisi. 
Mom:  how do you plan on having the life that you want Sne.
Me:  Let’s just go home mama.
Her:  You should listen to your daughter.  Leave those people alone.
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EDDIE
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I missed the dinner party last month and everyone learned that Khanyi and Qhawe were married.  What they don’t know is that I  knew about this whole thing and they are going to kill me but they’ll get over it.  My wife is also pregnant and it’s been great.  We just got back from a holiday trip in Cape Town.  We needed the time to ourselves.  I want us to spend as much time together as we can because when the baby is born, we won’t have enough time to ourselves. 
Me:  Hey Khanyi
Khanyi:  Hey Eddie, what’s up?
Me:  I need you to help with the number fo the Sangamo lady we met then we were in King Williams town.  I wanted to tell here that my is pregnant .  she told us to be patient that we will be blessed with another  child.  I must say I didn’t believe her but today I feel the need to than her.
Khanyi:  I’ll give you her number you can call her.  Over the years I have learned to trust her.  She is the only traditional healer that I actually trust.  She has helped me with a lot things in my life.
Me:  I hear you.  So how did the family take the news?
Khanyi:  not so well but they have accepted it and they are looking forward to the Zambia trip.
Me:  I told you that it would work.  What about Lwazi, Lisa and lwanelele .
Khanyi:  those three are so dramatic.  Qhawe is buying Lwazi a watch that he has been meaning to buy for himself, I don’t know what the girls are getting.
Me:  we’ve been  keeping tabs on everyone who is in prison because of us and so far there  are no threats and no problems.
Khanyi:  that’s great news.  I need your help with something though.
Me:  I’m listening
Khanyi:  I think that one of the employees of one of the construction companies is steaing from us, I’m not sure who it is.  Can you look into it for me.
Me:  Sure no problem.  When did you speak to Nkosikhona’s wife?
Khanyi:  I think two weeks back, wh?
Me:  I just think that we need to watch her kids.  They might come for revenge in the furture.
Khanyi:  I really hope they don’t.  the last thing I would want to do is destroy their lives.  They must come after my kids otherwise there will be hell to pay.