Right Kind Of Wrong

he's mine , all mine

When we arrive home that evening Jay says can I move back in ur room , I say our room . He's smiling like a loon .. I love it.. we walk in our room and I take my blanket out of the bag an put it on the bed ,Jay looks at me and says really ? Yes I say firmly . He says I told u I'm here now I'll keep u warm ..he pulls me to him .. I say we should talk .. Jay says later baby and starts to undress me .. he says baby I don't know how to get this ..off . He's talking about the corset . I unhook it for him and he takes it and hangs it up in the closet ,I give him the look he says safe keeping and smiles .. when we climb in the bed Jay is being so loving .. not like earlier. . This time he is taking his sweet time .. earlier was loving but in a I don't have a lot of  time way I need you right now way .. right now he's taking way to long to get down to business, it's driving me crazy ! He says what's wrong .. in his darken room voice .. boy I'm gonna attack u .. I'm thinking .. but I just tell I need him ... he takes a deep breath and say I need you more .as he rolls over on top .. he says we gonna be OK ? I say yes.. he shakes his head yes and is nuzzling me again. I know with out a doubt Jay needs me as much in as I need him. . Knowing full well that Jay is spent and content now. I ask him can we talk ...he grumbles some incoherent something in my neck .. he's still being so loving and needing to be loved on .. I lay there for a while just rubbing him softly while he's laying on my chest he's calm now .. very calm .. is this boy a sleep ?I lean up a tab ... he says uhhhh. No ...  jay? Huh baby ? He ask in that I'm so tired voice the one that melts my heart .. just checking to see if ur awake .. I need to pee.. he smiles . I get up and go to the door I look back and see jay putting his under wear on.. hmmm. When I finish , I go to the kitchen I see Rick eating some kinda sandwich.  He says hey Mel ain't seen u in a few days .. I say hey .. he says how are u? I'm good . I tell him .. I look up and say thank you .. he smiles.  He knows I know he has worked on getting jay back on the right track. And I couldn't be any happier!   Jay seemed more of him self tonight. The jay I fell in love with. . I'll always worry that Jay may slip ... but I told him tonight I trusted him .. and that's what I'm gonna do . I'll give us one more chance ! Everyone deserves a sec chance .. after that ur on ur own .. and I will be too.. after I grab a bottled Pepsi , I walk back to my room I see jay laid out he's sleeping.  I could stare him like this for days ..  I sit down at my vanity drink  my Pepsi and smoke .. I stare at jay for a long time , praying he is really ok.. I love him too much . And I remember I lied to him .. makes my stomach ache.... I just couldn't tell him what I'd done . It would have changed everything!  I could not take the chance of us not getting back together. .. I crawl back in bed with Jay ...  the next morning I wake up and Jay is wrapped around me so tight . It's the best feeling I've had in 4  mons.  He wakes up and says hey beautiful.  Hey gorgeous I say to him. . He smiles . He says I'm so glad I woke up in ur arms .. me too I say . He's looking at me closely . He says I like ur hair .. it looks good . I say thank you. . I don't know why u cut it off tho .. I love your hair long he says .. I say because first of all I didn't cut it short .. it's still long ..and because I needed to change it up .. he says u did not Need any change . U were and are exactly what I want .. I tell him come on we should make some breakfast. . He smiles at me and looks like u know what I want... in tell him come on I'll make ur pancakes.. he says u know .. and I say I love u jay .. he says I love you more baby .. we go to the kitchen