Right Kind Of Wrong

making the best of paradise

I walk toward the door and Jay leaped off the bed and grab me he said baby pleas don't go yet . Are we OK ? Yes Jay we are good. I just promised Maria I'd help with everything. . He says baby ur on Vacation, I want you to relax. ,, it would be easier to relax in Iraq. . I think .. Jay says can I hold you . ? I hold him tight for a min. I know he's having a hard time .. I'm having a Harder time ..but I don't show it . I can't believe Jay slept with that old ass woman. I mean she don't look that old ,and I know his mom passing was so hard on him. And I know first hand grief will make you do stupid shit. Hints sleeping with Sam . I was beyond gone that night. .being with out Jay is worse then dealing with his past .. it's like he makes me feel so good and I love him so much . He has a never expiring get out of jail free card. And my V card . And my heart . This is tuff. Life as an adult hurts .. Jay says lay down with me for just a min. I know he will won't to make love. He thinks it fixes all. But I need him to know it don't. I look at him . Jay I can't right now. I love you . I say he looks so sad. And it does things to me I have to leave this room . I walk out the door ,I'm in the kitchen when I see Keith come in the back door . He's all happy. Always happy . I like Keith . I decide then and there he's my uncle now .. I smile .. Keith says hey sweet heart . I say hey uncle Keith . He says I like it . I laugh .. we sit at the island and talk . He says u look like you could use a real good uncle Keith talk . One that can't be had here ... I shake my head yes . He says after breakfast I wanna show u something. Ok? Yes. I'll be ready .Jay walks up ready for what ? I say Keith is gonna take me to run a errand .no big deal . Jay smiles at Keith . We all sit down for breakfast Keith says I only come here for the food . We all laugh . Jay says cuz the company sucks , yall suck, he's laughing . I say some better then others and they all die laughing . Jay is red faced . I knew I could change the atmosphere. . Keith said here here and raised his glass . Jay clinked Keith glass and mine . He winks at me .. after breakfast Jay walks in the bed room with me . He says where are u going with my uncle . I look at him hard , you don't trust me ? Jay says Melanie don't do anything stupid please . Please just don't. I'll take care if it I promise . What do you think I'm gonna do Jay ? I ask . He says I'm not sure I don't put much past you these days .. I grit my teeth hard and say u think Imma go fuck ur uncle ? Really Jay ? Wow .. he grabs my arm as I'm walking toward the bathroom ..NO ! That's not at all what I meant. I thought u might be going to beat her ass. Or tell her husband. Or hell. I don't know . I never know .. you do things I think you'd never do , all the time now baby . It's hard to be with someone who is unpredictable huh? I say .. he looks at me hard and closes his eyes . His mouth all squelched up says he's not very happy . I walk into the shower , a minute later Jay is behind me. He wraps his arms around me and says I did not want to fight this week baby please let's not fight . I didn't wanna fight either . Jay . But you've lied to me .u said u slept with 4 people, and u forgot to put the two 00 behind that 4 ... he says baby u wouldn't have let me touch u .. I say so u lie .. he says if I knew then what I know now yes . I'd lie again .because ur mine now and I'm in love with you. I wouldn't give that back .. and his jedi mind tricks start again.. I pull away from him and say how many Jay and how many if them were old or to young ... imma need to know , you know before go to figi on our honey moon and meet 30 more bitches who wanna ruin our life .... Jay leans in close to me he's got his hand on my thigh moving up to my ass .. he says you wanna go to Figi... on our honey moon ? I laugh ..like really laugh. I out my head to his chest and laugh .. he's smiling . I lean back and say answer me . He looks up at me like wow u found ur confidence. . I turn and wash .. he's standing there just looking at me. , I say Jay don't tell me anything if ur gonna lie again. I'd rather. Not have this same conversation 2 more yrs. From now .