Right Kind Of Wrong

night and days

So Jay you did the same thing I did . I say he says yes .. I say get out ! He looks at me and says wait baby , we can fix this just calm down ... no Jay I really think we both have lost sight of what is right and wrong here . We have reached a point where we don't need this relationship as much as we once did ... I'm pulling my clothes out my closet I'm packing a bag I have to get everything I'll need for school tomorrow and work .. Jay says wow . Do you really feel that's true Melanie .. he ask. Yes I do ! I say as I'm packing my makeup and hair stuff .. he says you don't think we can fix this if we really try . I look him straight in the eye and say I don't have time to play head games with you any more Jay . You been gone for three days . You vamp when times get tuff. So it's my turn to vamp for a while .. he says you don't have to leave ur house .I'll go to grandpa's . No . Jay stay here sleep in this bed without me . See what it's like to worry where I'm at or who I'm with . Lay in that bed and smell the pillows my scent, but u can't touch me .. I want u to feel what I feel . I want you to miss me ! He says I do ..in his sad voice .. nope I'm doing this .you can't jedi mind fuck me today . I'm mad . And I'm really over this shit.. you always have me so focused on you that I've never gotten to know who I am .. I say .. he looks like wow that makes sense . I take all my shit to my car . I've packed my poor car down .. I go back in the house , I walk to the kitchen grab two Frappuccino sb bottles . I look up and see Rick .. he says hey come here . If you need me call me . I'm always gonna be here for you no matter what . You need to calm down before u drive . And be careful out there . I know you are grown now but this world can be a bad place .. so u come home if want to . I say thank u. I'm calm . I am .. I walk back in my room Jay is sitting on the end if the bed . I walk up to him he looks up at me . I say Jay I really hope you still want me after I figure out who I am .. I just need to be go . I'm sry . I lean down and kiss him .. he Kiss me . He says I'll always be here for you . I'm sry . I'm sry too .. I walk / run out the door get in my car and hold the steering wheel and sob ..... a few minutes later I start the car .. I'm sitting in Sam's drive way .. him and his brother got a house a few weeks ago .. I'm sitting here just numb , I'm nervous, I'm sad , I'm hurt , I'm lost , I cry hard .. when I look up Sam is helping me out of my car .. he takes my keys out . He shuts the door and we week sale in the house .he takes me straight to his room . I lay down on his bed and sob .. for an hour or three . .. he has been rubbing my back . Not saying a word . He knows . It's gotten dark outside. I roll over to face sam.. he says it's gonna be OK .I put my face to his chest, he holds me so tight . .. two hours later I'm sitting in my car at the park .. I'm looking at the merry-go-round and thinking how did I let it go so wrong from there .. I'm sobbing so hard .. I've done the ultimate wrong !!!! And I've left the love of my life ! I dance on a bar for money . I'm so fucked up .there is no hope for me .. I sit there and sob.. my phone rings .. I look at it it's Tam .. I can't . She will be so disappointed in me ..she calls three more times I answer .. she says where are u ? Tell me now .. I'm at the park . I hang up .. she's there in no time . I look at her she is in the passenger seat she just pulls me in her arms . After a few minutes I sit up and look at her she says sam called me.. I look down and cry .. she says he said Mel needs you more then ever right now ..I'm here so tell me what's got u this upset .. what happen .. she says ... I'm so upset at my thoughts I'm not even sure I can talk .. I step out the car Walk to the trunk and pull out a shirt and blow my nose on it .. Tammie is stand next to me . I say walk with me .. we walk to the swings and sit ...