Right Kind Of Wrong

working my life out

Sam and I have been talking for three hours and we have agreed to be friends and not let this come between us . We agree never again .. it's 4 am .. when I drop him off at his house .. I pull out the drive way and wonder where am I going ? . I call kammie .. I drive past my house and see Jays car is still there .. I imagine him in our bed .. I cry . The next day at around 1:00 I wake up to kammie blending some fruit veggie thing it's looks like those grass things zaee and I had at the spa ... she says here I made u one too u look like u could use some healthy stuff.. I have me ewwww face on .. she says now ..I take it and drink it I'm shocked ! It taste good . Really good. She says yeah I'm a good cook too. I'm going to culinary school to I start next week . Oh wow . Who knew .. awesome . We talk food and recipes for another hour . She hands me a key and says you can stay here anytime sweetie! Aww thanks . I go get ready for this long day . I pull up to this restaurant and look around .. I smoke a cig and drink my lemonade. . I've got a few minutes before I have to go inside .. when I leave this restaurant I've been told I have to be there 4 days a week for at least 4 hours a day .. but anytime . I just come in when I leave school or whatever I can this guy is willing to let me work when ever I have time just so long as I get my hours in .. cool chef Jeff is awesome . And it don't hurt that he's cute as a button . And so sweet .. I drive to my house . I'm home alone . So I have to clean this place up while I'm washing all my clothes . I hold my breath when I hear a key in the door . Not ready to see Jay .. it's Rick . He says hey doll.. I say hi . He sits at the table where I'm folding laundry . He says how are you .. I'm good . I tell him all about school and the restaurant where I'll work for free ..we laugh I have to do what I can .. he agrees. Hey Melanie I just want u to know I support u 100% I'm not mad at you . What happens between you and my son is none if my business. He says . Not true Rick . I say .. he tells u everything and I tell u everything. So we put u in the middle .. and I want ur advice and help . So please don't feel like u shouldn't be in the middle .. he says OK . I ask did he move out . No he said he was staying here no matter what .. oh OK . I guess that means I Need to go .. I think to myself .. 2 hours later every article of clothing I own is clean . I've taken a shower and out on a sweat suit it's light gray v neck so I have white tank top on under it .. socks on. I'm comfy and ready to watch TV while I devour this container of sinful soul ice cream .. yes that's what's it's called .. really . .
I hear some females laugh outside my front door .. Tammie is a Lil tipsy and has molly and two other girls with her .. they come in and say awwwww boo is sad eating very appropriate ice cream .. bite me ! I say as I take on another huge bite ... Tammie says forgive Mel. She's having a really hard time right now .. I look at her . I say yeah! She says they broke up .. all the girls turn to me in shock !!! I say yep. We all get comfortable on my mommas sectional sofa .. they wanna talk it out with me . Hey we are here for u boo... says molly. She's just so happy to have a night out .. I look up at Tammie and say I haven't seen him yet. It's gonna hurt like nails shot out of a cannon at my head .. she says yes it is baby girl .. sad faces !! Some of the other girls had to go , so Tammie and molly Val they will stay with me . We are talking I tell Tammie I'm sick she says like ? Like I haven't been able to have one happy thought . I'm never ever gonna forgive myself ,and I dam sure no Jay wouldn't !!! She's lookin at me like wow u poor Thang ... molly is lost , I look at molly and say you can never ever repeat this .. he says ok .I wouldn't .. I say molly I slept with Sam . Her face is shock .. pure shock !! Like omg... I say no one knows not no one so please . She's says Mel I'd never ever . OK. She ask is that why u and Jay split .. oh ! No! . He don't even know . I broke up with Jay for all kindsa other reasons . But not that .. but I was so upset I couldn't see to drive so I went straight to Sam's house and we went in his bedroom I laid down on the bed and he was just rubbing my back while I sobbed over my horrible exist! ! But a few hours later I found myself under him doing the two timing tango!! Molly is laughing . But trying to say I'm sry ur funny. She says wait it's not two timing if u had broke up with Jason .. words don't really matter when ur heart is still his .. and my heart will always be Jays .. always. She says wow .I guess ur right .. Tammie says hey Mel said Sam was good tho .as she going to the kitchen ..she laughing . I yell at her it was good . But there are levels .. and well.. molly looks like her dead uncle just materialized in the door frame . Or maybe pin head .. she looks terrified. . I turn quick to see what has her this scared .. and the fear that came over me was unmatched. .my heart rate shot from normal to the plane is going down ..