Undertale Boiz x Reader

IIIIIIIIIIIIII'M GONNA SWIIIIING ON THAT POOOOLE [Lust!Sans x Monster!Reader]

That joke in the title, yeah. The gif explains it. It's a chandelier joke. A pun on popular music. I AM TRYING TO BE FUNNY PLZ LAUGH

Today was a rough day. The guy you thought was your boyfriend just was caught having sex with some other girl. In fact, it was one of Muffet's Prostitutes. You know this place is all about the sex life but would it kill god to find ya one loyal a,n for once in your life? 

Long story short, you broke up with him over something he honestly thought was very stupid. He was angry at you for taking offense to it. It burnt you on the inside. To think you lost your precious virginity to this guy...

So that's pretty much sums out how you ended up at Grillby's, watching sexy monsters like yourself Swing the sleeves aorund a pole, lick a pole, and show off their bodies against a pole. Honestly, it was eye catching. The one sexual activity down here you didn't bash.

The Stripper working the pole you were watching was a skeleton. He was a pretty damn hot skeleton too. He wore a black crop top that cling to his ribs and some black skinny jeans clinging to his bones. A purple and cyan vest was thrown off and on the ground. You actually had the urge to take it to give the stripper an excuse to talk to ya. 

You know what? Fuck you and your poor, kicked out ass. You found a small stash of loose change in your pocket. You pushed through the crowd to meet the keeper of this place. You took the loose change and gave it to him.

"Give it to that sexy skeleton. If he asks where I am, I'm behind this building. Got it?"

The hotheaded guy nodded, asking the money and stashing it in his own white as snow khakis. Seriosuly, how on earth were those not burning to a crisp with the rest of his body? Oh well, whatever. After a show like that all you needed was a good smoke to calm you down entirely.

Sans finished his little dance with a long lick up the metalic pole. Huh, he forgot that this one tasted like copper. Yes, he could tell the difference between metals with a lick. When you lick poles for a living you learn a few things.

Monsters were squealing, throwing money at him. He took his vest and threw it on his shoulders, shooting a few winks and blow kisses at the monsters. Who knows, maybe one of them would be good for a good fuck later. He sees Grillby motioning him over. Was something up? Sans went over there.

"Hey, Grillbz. Need something?"

He watches Grillby open his bones and place a nice stash of gold into his hand. At least twenty gold. If anyone calls this "loose change" they must be crazy rich! Or at least used to be crazy rich and privlaged. 

"Woah, that's a nice profit. Uh, who would want to give this to little old me~?"

Grillby pointed to the back doors of the strip club. Sans chuckled, adjusting his vest to reveal a little bit Moreno of his black shirt. The heart in it bent with his ribs, but he still looked sexy as hell. 

"Wow, this one has a whole thing planned. It's as if they're begging for me to ram them up the wall. Thanks Grillbz."

He flicks one of the coins back to his best friend before walking towards the back doors. He could already imagine what kind of monster would be waiting for him. Most likely a sexy lady with a nice ass, boobs, and a very small height. Kinda like that catty girl he fucked not to long ago. She was a nice hourglass, his ideal figure.

Well well we'll, hate has he here? The monster there's was even sexier than he would have thought. They actually looked like they could make King Asgore their bitch they were so sexy. They had a cigarette in mouth and puffed out some smoke. He could appreciate a monster who also had the same habits as him.

"Heya, Sweetheart."

You turned your head and saw that same skeleton stripper from earlier. Damn, he actually looked better with that crazy purple vest on. The purple brought out the color of his pupils floating around in his eyesockets and the cyan matched the little heart on his tight as fuck shirt.

"Heya Skellie. Nice performance up there. So, enjoy the tip?"

Sans threw up the gold coins and caught them yet again. He smirks at the monster to get the point across that twenty gold is plenty enough for a "tip." He usually takes me in seven a day on a good day. This would get him and Papyrus more than just "by" this week~.

"Very much. Well, there is one thing that could make it even better~"

You watched the skeleton look you up and down. Ha! He was checking you out. Probably another fuckboy. It wasn't like you weren't expecting it. You just wanted to tell him that he looked hot and you thought he was Sexy on that pole. Everyone deserves a compliment, ya know?

"Sorry, hun. I'm closing the Bone Zone."

Sans scoffed. He crossed his arms across his ribcage. He looked at this monster. She had that kind of dominant and sassy style. He liked it. In fact, he was kind of turned on by this monster. Plus it was a nice pun. He wouldn't mind being this gal's bitch either~ 

"Ooh, Sassy~ Is there any way you can open it back up for little old me?"

It was your turn to scoff and look him up and down. You didn't I know why you did this'll, you already determined that he was sexy as hell. You smirked at him, making eye to eyesocket contact like all classy people do.

"Are you loyal?"

Sans did not expect something like that to come out of her mouth. Why would being loyal matter to anyone? Everyone he fucked didn't give two shits if he left the next morning or not. It was all about living in the moment.

"Excuse me?"

He was clearly taken aback by this. Your face went stern while he was just smiling awkwardly in confusion, shape if telling you to say that again. Of course. Nobody in Snowdin would ever expect someone who wants a long term relationship.

"Would you stay loyal if you had a girlfriend? Have sex with nobody but her? Flirt with nobody but her? Stay true to her and her alone?"

That clarification was nothing he was used to either. He blinked, if skeletons like himself could even blink like that, and looked at this girl again. She was joking, right? She looked dead serious. She was hot though, which he could deal with. She was sexy as hell, smoked, and gave him twenty gold. Ah, what the hell? Why not?

"If ya want me to, girly~"

That answer was nothing more than comforting, but it reassured the part of your brain that would do anything to get this guy to date you. You smirk at him and stick out your hand, as if proposing a deal to him. Well, you were. 

"I'll open the bonezone if you date me for a little while~."

You drag out your words to seem more seductive and convincing. You even bite your lower lip and cutely look into his eyesockets. You could see the heart pupils flicker with excitement as his fingerless gloves hand combines with yours into a handshake.

"Deal."

OKAY THIS IS THE FIRST CHAPTER FOR MY BOOK JESUS CHIRST THAT WAS GOOD!!!

~Eva