Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man In A Zombie Apocalypse. Entries 957 - 1157

Entry 1015: Monday 8th July 2019

Entry 1015
Monday 8th July 2019

I'm still in Cowes but I think I've come up with a plan to get Nikki talking to me.

I slept better than I thought I would, but it certainly wasn't the most comfortable night's sleep being squashed up next to Mike in a single bed b*llock to b*llock. When I started to wake up in the morning, I felt something digging into the small of my back. I bluntly opened my eyes and felt a sense of dread. "Mike," I firmly said, "What the f*ck is THAT digging into the top of my arse crack?" "It's just my knob," said Mike. "WHAT!?" I loudly gasped in horror as I quickly sat bolt upright in bed and looked at Mike with outrage. "My knob," said Mike, as he produced the knob to his bedroom from under the covers. "What the f*ck have your brough that bl**dy thing to bed with you for?" I exclaimed. "Well, I know you don't like sharing a bed with me when I'm in the buff," said Mike, "So I thought I'd put my jogging bottoms on. My knob's in the pocket." "Will you please get that bl**dy knob back on the door," I bluntly said. "I can't," said Mike, as he waved the knob around, "It keeps falling off." "God, will you stop waving your knob in my face," I snapped. "Alright benders," said TJ, who suddenly appeared in the doorway, "If you're going to gay-off with each other at least close the door so I don't have to see you sucking each other off."

Mike and I met with Sci-Fi Cyn in Sails Café. Obviously, we had a lot to talk about over our usual cup of tea. I told Cyn about everything that happened yesterday, and Mike kept chipping in. "She's been hitting him," said Mike, "Look at his head. She threw a plate at him. She threw four plates at him. She's been knocking him about for ages." "Mike, shut up" I said. "Well, I did have my suspicions," said Sci-Fi Cyn. "What do you mean you had your suspicions?" I asked. "Well, I suspected Nikki was being violent," said Sci-Fi Cyn. "Stop exaggerating," I said, "It's not violence." "Chucking plates at you?" said Sci-Fi Cyn, "If you don't call that violence, what do you call it?" "Look, if you had suspicions, why didn't you say something?" I snapped. "Oh, come on, Luke," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "You know the answer to that. You didn't want to know. I asked you if you wanted me to be nice or to be honest, and you said you wanted me to be nice. Remember? [ENTRY 988]. You were burying your head in the sand then, and you're burying your head in the sand now." "I'm not burying my head in the sand," I said, "I'm trying to sort things out." "How?" asked Sci-Fi Cyn, "How exactly are you trying to sort things out? Luke, Nikki is a perpetrator of abuse. Do you really think this is the sort of relationship you deserve to be in?" "She doesn't like me," said Mike, "She called me an unhinged crazy psycho. She called you a freaky science fiction weirdo." "I don't care what she thinks of me," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "I care about how she is treating Luke." "Look, let's just calm down," I said, "Nikki is NOT a perpetrator of abuse. She just lost her tempter a few times. We've all done it, and let's be honest, I haven't exactly helped have I?" "So, you've decided to make excuses for her behaviour and minimise her actions?" said Sci-Fi Cyn. "It's OK," said Mike, "He's with us now. We'll look after him." "Mike, I'm not staying here forever," I said, "I'm only here temporarily. I've got a life in Sandown. My house is there, my girlfriend's there, my son's there, my job's there... Sort of." "Babes, you can't go back there," said Mike, "Nikki could kill you." "Oh, stop exaggerating," I said, "She's not going to kill me. I just need to stop lying, be a man and be honest with her no matter how uncomfortable it might be." "Luke, she doesn't want you being friends with me, Mike, Trudy or TJ," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "How are you going to get around that?" "Well, right now, I don't know," I said, "But I think once things have calmed down, we can get together and talk about all this. Anyway, has Blade figured out who killed the utilised infected yet?" "No," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "I don't think it's a current priority right now. Anyway, the only infected currently being utilised are the ones inside the power stations, so the general public can't get to them. Anyway, I think you should be more bothered about sorting out your relationship problems." "This will all be sorted in a few days," I said. "How do you think it will all get sorted?" asked Sci-Fi Cyn. "Well, I'll say sorry for lying, and Nikki will say sorry for faking injuries and for throwing a plate at me," I said. "And the other three plates," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "And for hitting you... and for punching you...and for hitting you with clock." "Yeah, OK," I snapped. "You know, if I told Jon what was happening, he could send a GRID soldier around to speak to Nikki," said Sci-Fi Cyn. "No," I angrily said," I don't want anyone at GRID knowing. It's up to me who knows what's going on. I don't want Blade knowing, and I don't want anyone getting into trouble." "Fine," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "It's your choice. I won't say anything."