Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man In A Zombie Apocalypse. Entries 957 - 1157

Entry 1078: Monday 9th September 2019

Entry 1078
Monday 9th September 2019

I sat Nikki down today and tried to lay down the law with her and come up with some rules. It was bl**dy hard work. I just got abuse, mind games and victim-playing!

Late in the morning, I was sat at the dining room table, gearing myself up to have a good talk with Nikki. She walked into the living room, and I called her over and asked her to join me at the dining table. With a curious look on her face, she sat at the opposite end of the dining table and asked me what was going on. "I just think we need to talk," I said. "What about?" snapped Nikki looking p*ssed off and crossing her arms. "Well, how about you nearly burning the house down yesterday?" I bluntly said. "Don't exaggerate, Luke," said Nikki, "A small bunch of flowers caught fire. It's hardly the towering inferno." "The whole house could have gone up in flames if I hadn't of chucked water all over the place. You weren't going to do anything were you?" "Oh, so it's all my fault, is it?" exclaimed Nikki. "Yes!" I loudly snapped, "I'm not the one that chucked the tealights off the dining room table." "Yes, well if you hadn't of been selfish and had a meal with me instead of your bl**dy Mother, none of that would have happened," snapped Nikki. "Are you for real!?" I exclaimed, "I'm selfish for having a meal with my Mum? Is that what you're saying?" "You should have known that I was going to cook us a meal," said Nikki. "How should I have known?" I asked, "I'm not psychic?" "Well, I used to cook for you before," said Nikki. "That's when we were together," I said, "Nikki, you need to get this through your head, we are NOT together anymore. We just share a house and soon, a child." "I'm just trying to be nice," said Nikki. "Oh yeah," I sarcastically said, "Having a go at me and trashing the dining room. Really nice. What do you do when you want to be really, really nice? Try and stab me? Oh no, wait. You've already done that." "So, you can make me a meal, like that salad, but if I make you a meal, that's not allowed?" snapped Nikki. "Oh my God," I said, "What goes on in your head? I asked you if you wanted a salad, and you said yes. You didn't ask me about whether I wanted you to cook for me?" "Oh?" said Nikki, "So now I must ask you what you want me to cook for you?" "That's not what I said," I firmly said. "I'm not your skivvy, Luke," snapped Nikki. "You're twisting my words," I said, "Look. I'll tell you what. You cook for you, and I'll cook for me and then there's no misunderstanding is there?" "Oh, so my cooking isn't good enough for you, is it?" "Since, I had your dodgy home-made chicken pie, no it's not f*cking good enough," I snapped, "You sort you out, and I'll sort me out. I won't cook for you, and you won't cook for me, at least not without speaking to each other first." "Fine," snapped Nikki as she stood up from the table. "Oh," I said, "By the way. Me and Ash were talking about going for a drink. Because of your ex's stupid curfew, I was thinking of inviting him to come round here for a drink one evening." "I didn't think you were talking to Ash?" said Nikki. "Well, it looks like we've sort of made up," I said, "I just thought I'd let you know that he might come over one night." "I don't know why you're bothering to tell me anything?" snapped Nikki, "What I think clearly doesn't matter. My opinion's not important to you, is it? You have got lots of friends. I don't have any." "That's because everyone thinks you're a total b*tch," I said. Nikki looked really offended. "Oh?" said Nikki, "So that's how you're going to speak to the mother of your unborn child is it? Do you think comments like that are going to help me? Do you think they'll reduce my stress or increase? Do you want me to get stressed? Maybe you want me to lose this baby through stress. Is that what you want?" "No," I firmly said, "Of course that's not what I want. Look, if you promise to try and not give me any stress, I promise to try and not give you any stress." "That sounds like blackmail to me," said Nikki. "Nikki, it's a compromise," I firmly said, "Jesus, are you just going out of your way to make this set up as hard as it can be?" "What are you talking about!?" exclaimed Nikki, "I cooked dinner for you last night. That was me making an effort, and you just threw it back in my face. If anyone's making this hard, it's you!" "Oh, I don't know why I bother," I snapped, throwing my arms up in the air as I stood up from the dining table. It all comes back to you being a victim, doesn't it? I mean, you just twist my words and play mind games, don't you? I'm trying to have a conversation with you where we can find some common ground here. I've moved back in so I can be here whilst you're pregnant, be there for the birth, and earn some money... credits...whatever, so I can look after our child." "Aaaaw," Nikki, sarcastically said, "What do you want? a medal for doing the right thing? God, you're pathetic." "Right," I snapped, "That's it. I'm off. I'll be back when I feel like it. I must have been as mental as you to think we could have an adult, civil conversation. Well, don't say I didn't f*cking try. I'll be back later. Try not to light any candles."

I stormed out and went for a walk on Sandown Beach to try and walk off some of my anger, and now I'm in my room trying to calm down. I can't believe I was ever in a relationship with that woman. She infuriates me so much. I honestly don't think I've met anyone who is THIS manipulative. I can't believe I couldn't see all this sh*t before. Mind you, maybe I could see it. Perhaps I just didn't want to see it. It's pretty clear there's no rational reasoning with Nikki, so in the absence of being able to sit down and talk like adults I need to manager her as best as I can. Perhaps if I view this situation like I used to view tricky work situations involving arsey staff members, that might help. I could see Nikki as a b*tchy staff member, and my job is to manager her and deal with her as best as I can. I don't know. It's going to be a long pregnancy if she keeps being unreasonable like this. Mind you, I knew what I was letting myself in for, but living with the moody cow is actually a lot worse than the thought of it. I just need to keep putting my foot down and give her the message that no matter what manipulative mind games she plays, I won't put up with it, and I won't take any of her sh*t.