Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man In A Zombie Apocalypse. Entries 957 - 1157

Entry 1083: Saturday 14th September 2019

Entry 1083
Saturday 14th September 2019

I've hardly seen Nikki today, and it's been quite nice.

I met up with Mike, Sci-Fi Cyn, and Mum at The Beach Café in Sandown. Mum brought Leo, and it was nice to sit with him as the rest of us had a chat over a cuppa. I told the three of them about Nikki's putting Minnie's corpse in my bed and about me laying down the law. "Sorry," said Sci-Fi Cyn, shaking her head, "She has kept your dead cat and then climbed through your bedroom window and put the dead cat IN your bed?" "Yeah..." I said. "Sausage," said Mum, "But enough is enough. That woman is mad. You're not going to stay there after all this are you?" "Mum, I keep telling you," I said, "I know she's off her head but I don't want to be there for all the baby stuff." "B*llcoks to all the baby stuff," said Mum, "She's off her hinges. You're going to wake up dead!" "Can you wake up dead?" asked Mike. "Luke, you can't day in that house with that insane woman," said Mum. "I think your Mum's right," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "I'm saying to get really worried about you. Maybe you should have a word with Tinsley." "No," I said, "I don't want him involved. He scares the sh*t out of me. I know it's a weird situation but I'll handle it." "How will you handle it?"  asked Mum. "Why did she put the cat in your bed?" asked Mike, "Doesn't she have a spade to bury it in the back garden or something?" "Look," I said, "Mum," I said, "Ignoring Mike. Stop making a fuss." "Stop making a fuss!?" I exclaimed, "The mad b*tch has put a dead cat in your bed. I think it's acceptable to make a bl**dy fuss." "why don't you just get her locked up in The Isle of Wight Prison?" asked Mike. "Because I don't want my baby born in a prison," I said. "I'm sorry, Luke," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "But at this rate I think you might have to choose your baby being born in prison or you suffering serious harm... Or worse."

I can totally see why everyone's worried about me but the fact that I've hardly seen Nikki today suggests that my firm confrontation with her yesterday might have actually made an impact. I suppose I just need to keep an eye on the situation. As long as the crazy tw*t doesn't put anymore dead animals in my bed, I'll be happy. 

Anyway, Ash will be here soon and were going to have a lad's night in with lots of alcohol. I'm looking forward to it, I hope Nikki doesn't start being a f*cking psycho. I've just tidied up the living room and got all the booze ready. All being well it's going to be a nice, relaxing and enjoyable evening.