Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man In A Zombie Apocalypse. Entries 957 - 1157

Entry 1055: Saturday 17th August 2019

Entry 1055
Saturday 17th August 2019

My God. Nikki came to Cowes with me and it all kicked off! I'm currently sat in bed on my own, writing my diary without Nikki. She isn't here. I don't know where she is.

The drama started after Nikki and I arrived in Cowes ready to meet up with Mum, Mike and Cyn so we could both spend time together with Leo. We arrived in Cowes, got off the bus and walked towards Sails Café. "OK," I said to Nikki, as we walked down the pedestrian area, "Remember what we said. We're going to be civil and polite and all try to make an effort. Yes?" "Don't patronise me, Luke," Nikki said firmly, "I'm not a child." "I know you're not," I said, "I just want this to go ahead without any problems." "What are you saying?" snapped Nikki, "That I WANT there to be problems? That I want to CAUSE problems?" "No," I said, "I..." "Look, Luke," said Nikki, interrupting me, "I just want to see Leo. I don't give a toss about your Mum and your weird friends." "Yeah, well, let's just focus on contributing to a nice atmosphere so we can enjoy spending time with Leo."

Nikki and I approached the café, opened the door, walked inside and stood in the entrance. I looked towards the usual table where I sat with Mum, Mike and Cyn. The three of them were there with Leo. I immediately saw them looking rather awkward and uncomfortable. I was about to say something to put Nikki at ease, but before I had a chance to say anything, she quickly walked over to the table with a huge smile on her face and picked up Leo from Mum. "Hello gorgeous," said Nikki with a big smile on her face, "Oh, I have missed you!" I walked over and joined everyone. "I got you and Nikki a cup of tea each," said Sci-Fi Cyn, pointing over to two mugs that were at the edge of the table. "Thanks," I said, flashing her a smile and appreciating her making the effort. "Nice to see you, Nikki," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "Are you well?" "Fine," said Nikki, with her back to the others and putting all of her attention into Leo. "Come and sit down," said Sci-Fi Cyn, "I've got you some tea." Giving me a stern look, Nikki turned round and flashed Cyn and the others a huge fake smile. With Leo in her arms, she sat down at the table with the others and I joined her. Mum wasn't even looking at Nikki, and the frustration on her face was clear. Mike was a different matter altogether. He sat opposite Nikki, not moving a muscle and staring at her right in the eye. It was a weird but sort of suspicious look. Like he was trying to figure her out. I looked at Mike and raised my eyebrows, signalling to him that he needed to relax and stop staring at Nikki, but the silly sod didn't notice. As me and Cyn tried to keep the conversation going in a desperate attempt to combat the palpable awkward atmosphere, Nikki just focused on Leo as Mike and Mum sat there making their dissatisfaction obvious. Nikki picked up Leo's drink and started to give him some but he dropped it and ended up getting juice all down his top. "Oh, dear," Nikki said to Leo in a playful tone, "Aren't you a silly billy?" "It was you who dropped it," Mum firmly said. Nikki gave Mum a blunt stare. "Oh, it doesn't matter," I said, trying to lighten the mood, "It'll come out." "I'll take him to the loo and go get him cleaned up," said Nikki. "No," said Mum, "I'll do it. I've got his bag and a clean top here. I'll do it." Mum stood up, took Leo from a very unhappy Nikki and went off with him to the toilet. Now that Nikki wasn't giving her attention to Leo the atmosphere took a sudden nose dive. I desperately tried to think of something to say as the tense silence lingered. "So..." I said, "The weather's been a bit.... Err... Well.... You know?" Mike maintained his tense staring of Nikki whilst she sat there with her arms folded and looking down. I looked at Sci-Fi Cyn and raised my eyes, signalling that I needed her help. Cyn wasn't able to say anything that would ease the obvious tension because we then had another problem; Naomi and TJ walked into the café. Cyn gave me a strange look that suggested I should look behind me. I did so and saw TJ and Naomi walking towards the counter. If the atmosphere wasn't awkward enough already, it was INCREDIBLY awkward now. Naomi and I exchanged uncomfortable expressions, and the fury and discomfort on Nikki's face was clear for all to see. TJ of course could always be counted upon to make the situation worse. "What the f*ck is this!?" he loudly said with a big smile on his face, "Mad Hatter's tea party." "Go away, TJ," I firmly said, "We're all just sitting here drinking tea and having a nice chat" "A nice chat!?" exclaimed TJ, "F*ck off! It looks like one of you has sh*t yourselves and trying to figure out who did it." "What are you doing here?" I snapped. "Me and She-Ra here are taking Sophie and Primark to the beach," said TJ. "You don't even have the kids with you," I said. "Ash, has got them outside," said TJ, "We've just popped in here to get a takeaway coffee. Didn't think we'd walk in on this sh*t show!" "We're spending time with Leo," I said. "Well, where is he?" asked TJ. "He spilt a drunk," I said, "He's with Mum in the loo." "It wouldn't be the first time your Mum was in that loo taking a male's top off," giggled TJ. "Just f*ck off," I snapped. "Yeah, come on TJ," said Naomi, "We can get a drink somewhere else." "B*llocks to that," said TJ, "We're here now. We're not going anywhere." TJ leant down, looked at Nikki and smiled. "Aright bunny boiler," he said, "You stopped kicking the sh*t out of him now?" My jaw dropped open and my eyes nearly popped out of their sockets! "TJ!" snapped Sci-Fi Cyn. "Luke, I want to go home," said a firm Nikki. "Oh, here we go," said TJ, "She wants to get Elizabeth back indoors so she can give him a good pasting. I've told you Nanna; you should kick her to the curb. You don't need this sh*t." "Luke!" snapped Nikki. "Look, it's OK," said Naomi, trying to keep the peace, "Me and TJ can go. Come on, TJ. We don't need to get a drink from here. I've got a bottle of water on me anyway." Naomi produced a bottle of water from her jacket pocket. "You don't want that," said TJ, grabbing the bottle of water off Naomi, "It's not even cold." TJ twisted the top off and smelt inside. "It smells funny too," he said. "TJ, just give me the bottle back," snapped Naomi. She extended her arm, and grabbed the bottle, but just as she did this Nikki turned round in an attempt leave, causing her to knock into the bottle, subsequently making Naomi drop it which resulted in Nikki being covered in water. We all gasped, and Nikki stood up with her arms held out, looking extremely angry. She slowly raised her head and gave Naomi, who looked rather mortified, a furious look. "That was an accident," Naomi said. A short pause followed which quickly came to grinding halt when Nikki raised her right hand and slapped Naomi hard across the face. Again, we all gasped. "So was that!" snapped Nikki. Cyn, Mike and I were frozen to the spot, feeling anxious and wondering what was going to happen. TJ looked on with anticipatory excitement as Nikki and Naomi exchanged tense and angry expressions. "You see," Naomi said to me, pointing at Nikki, "She's the violent one. Not me." "Don't you DARE talk to him," snapped Nikki. "I'll talk to whoever I like whenever I like," snapped Naomi, "You might boss Luke around but you're not bossing me around!" "You've just thrown water all over me!" snapped Nikki. "Are you deaf!?" snapped Naomi, "It was an accident!" "Yeah right," snapped Nikki, "I was just sitting here minding my own business when you show up causing trouble, again. All I want to do is spend time with my son." "Leo?" said Naomi, "He's not your son." "I'm the nearest thing to a mother he's got," snapped Nikki, "And I don't want to hear your opinion on me being Leo's Mum. I'm not interested. Mind you, I shouldn't really expect you to understand what it's like to feel like a Mother should I? From what I've heard you gave your kid up for adoption and then when you managed to track her down, she hated your guts. Hardly surprising is it!?" Oh God, I thought to myself as the atmosphere intensified and the look of fury on Naomi's face increased. I was just about to stand up and try and clam everything down, but before I had a chance to utter the first syllable, Naomi lunged at Nikki and launched into a full-on attack. Nikki fell backwards into the table that we were all sat at which caused the legs to snap and the top to drop sending mugs of tea, sachets of salt and a bottle of ketchup flying everywhere. Cyn, Mike, and I quickly leapt off our seats and I helped Nikki get back on her feet. "Get off me," she snapped, pushing me away. I stood in between Naomi and Nikki as Mike and Cyn joined TJ near the counter. "Look," I firmly said, "Let's all just calm down. I..." "Luke, get out of the way," snapped Nikki, pushing me out of the way and giving Naomi a stern stare. "Pushing him around again?" snapped Naomi, "Not the first time from what I've heard. You know people like you make me sick. You're a bully, but you're the worst sort of bully. You're the sort of bully that makes out everyone else is the bully and that you're the victim. You're not the victim, Nikki. You're the bully! We all know what you are. Violent. Manipulative. Controlling...Oh, and as for faking injuries, that's well and truly messed up. You don't want to hear my opinion on you being Leo's Mum? Well, you're going to hear it because none of us think a violent psycho like you is fit to look after a goldfish, let alone a child!" The fury on Nikki's face was visibly intense. She gave a huge scream and threw herself at Naomi. What followed was a huge cat fight that include Nikki and Naomi punching each other, hitting each other and throwing one another from one side of the café to the other. With my heart pumping I looked on at the violent scene, not knowing if I should intervene and try and break up the fight, or stand back and wait for it to end. "Luke, DO something!" said Sci-Fi Cyn. "Yeah," chuckled TJ, "Spray 'em down with a hose so we can see through their tops. Chuck some mud on them or something." "Will you stop shooting your mouth off!?" I snapped at TJ. "Shooting my mouth off!?" exclaimed TJ, "I'll be shooting my load in a minute. I've got a right stork on here. This is well horny." With Nikki flat on her back on the café floor, Naomi straddled her, clenched her first, propelled her arm back and punched Nikki in the face. "Naomi, stop it!" I shouted. My shouting distracted Naomi, meaning Nikki was able to jab her in the ribs with her elbow. Naomi fell to the floor, and Nikki quickly stood back up and started picking up items such as stray tomato sauce bottles and discarded sugar caddies and aggressively throwing them at Naomi on by one. "Nikki, don't!" I loudly said, "Mike, can you do something." Mike looked nervous and uncertain. Naomi then charged at Nikki, grabbed hold of her by the waist and threw her into the café door. The door window smashed as Nikki's arm went through it, and as Nikki inspected the cut on her arm, Naomi grabbed the back of Nikki's head, swung her around by her hair and threw her across the other side of the café. Nikki fell to the floor but quickly stood up, composed herself and picked up a small picture that was hanging up on the wall but was now on the floor. Nikki hurled the picture at Naomi, it her arm, and the glass shattered into pieces and fell on the floor. Naomi looked at the cut on her arm the smashing glass had caused, and then with a furious glare, she charged at Nikki grabbed hold of her by the scruff of her neck, and threw her into the corner of the café, once again causing her to fall backwards into a table, making the table collapse and the contents to go flying everywhere. "Are you done now B*TCH?" Naomi snapped at Nikki, wiping the sweat off her brow and dabbing the cut lip that Nikki had given her. "Naomi, stop it!" I loudly said. "Sorry, Luke, but she's been asking for it," said Naomi. Nikki stumbled to her feet and touched her left eye which was now surrounded by a red mark from where Naomi had hit her. "Maybe you're used to hitting people that won't hit you back?" Naomi snapped at Nikki, "Well, Luke might not whack you back, but I will." At that moment Mum appeared from the toilet with Leo in her arms. The café was a mess. Tables were damaged, chairs were broken and condiments were scattered all over the place. "What the Hell's happened?" Mum gasped. Nikki looked over at Leo and appeared rather upset. I suddenly felt very sorry for her. It was as if she felt guilty that Leo was seeing her in such a state. "Nikki," I said, "I..." "No!" she angrily snapped, "Stay here. I don't want to speak to you. I don't even want to look at you." Nikki then stormed out of the café and marched off up the High Street. At that point Ash walked in with Primark and Sophie. "What the Hell's happened in here!?" he gasped. I turned and whacked TJ on the arm as I gave him a stern stare. "You absolute tw*t!" I angrily snapped. "Me!?" gasped TJ, "What did I do!?" "You opened your mouth, you absolute pr*ck!" I snapped, "Why do you never think before you open your gob!? Spray them with a hose. Chuck mud on them!? You f*cking idiot!" "Look, Elizabeth, don't go blaming me cos you're going out with a f*cking lunatic," said TJ. "Do you have any idea the hassle that I'm going to get when I get home?" I snapped. "Then ditch the b*tch," snapped TJ, "F*ck knows why you're putting up with all this sh*t!?" "TJ, you should have just kept your mouth shut," said Naomi. "You can f*ck of an' all," I snapped at Naomi. "Excuse me!?" exclaimed Naomi, widening her eyes in shock. "Oh, don't look like that," I said, "TJ might be a tw*t for opening his mouth but I've come to expect that from him. But I expect better from you." "What!?" exclaimed Naomi. "Why did you have to start winding her up?" I snapped, "Why did you have to start throwing insults?" "SHE HIT ME!" yelled Naomi, "SHE HIT ME FIRST!" "You didn't have to hit her back," I snapped, "God, Naomi, Nikki's in counselling, and you've just given her a setback." "Oh, Luke," said Naomi, "You really need to open your f*cking eyes. That woman is poison." "She's my girlfriend," I said. "Well, she shouldn't be," snapped Naomi, "Don't stand there having a go at me when all I did was defend myself." "You didn't defend yourself!" I loudly exclaimed, "Nikki was baiting you and you snapped back." "Then she shouldn't have been baiting me!" Naomi loudly snapped. "Oh, f*ck this!" I loudly snapped, throwing my hands in the air, "I'm going home!" "Babes, I think I should come with you," said Mike. "No," I snapped, "I don't want any of you to come with me. I need to sort this mess out." "Luke," said Sci-Fi Cyn, sounding concerned, "I think Mike's got a point. Just stay here. We can sit down and try and sort this mess out together." "No," I firmly said, "I want to go home. I'll see you the day after tomorrow."

Feeling well and truly p*ssed off, I stormed out of the wrecked café and made my way to the bus stop hoping to catch up with Nikki. She wasn't there. She must have just managed to get the previous bus. Anyway, I waited a while, got on the next bus back to Sandown and when I arrived home, I was all geared up for a heated confrontation with Nikki but she wasn't there. This was weird. For a moment I thought she might have left me but all of her clothes are still in the wardrobe, and her vicious f*cking cat is still here. She hasn't left me a note and our household walkie talkie's still here, so I have no idea where she is. Her overnight bag has gone so I guess she's staying somewhere else tonight, but I have no idea where that could be. She doesn't really have any friends, so I can't think of who would give her a place to stay?

I laid on the sofa and tried to relax, when after a while there was a loud, aggressive knock at the front door. It was so loud it gave me a start. I gasped, sat bolt upright and looked towards the hallway, wondering who the Hell could be knocking so loudly. I got up off the sofa exited the living room, walked down the hallway, answered the door and was surprised and rather worried to see Acting Commander Tinsley standing there. I suddenly felt incredibly worried thinking that Tinsley had arrived to cart Nikki off to Prison for what happened in Cowes, or worse than that; throw her into The Hive. "She in?" he asked in a firm tone with a stern look on his face. "Do you mean Nikki?" I asked, with a slightly tremor in my tone. "No," said a sarcastic Tinsley, "I mean Angela Merkel; Chancellor of Germany... Who do you think I mean you f*cking loon?" Tinsley pushed me aside, barged past me and entered the hallway. "Look," I said, "She's not here. I don't know where she is. Look around if you don't believe me." "Stormed off, did she?" said Tinsley with a sinister grin, "Playing the victim is she? She's good at that. Well, I know all about her little scrap in Cowes with your girly mate Naomi. I've given her a good dressing down and now I need to do the same to Nikki." "Oh," I said, sounding surprised but feeling relived, "I thought you might have thrown them both in prison. Or worse..." "I'm seriously tempted" said Tinsley, "But on this occasion I'm prepared to be reasonable. I've given Naomi a warning, and I'll give Nikki one too. Any trouble after the warning is issued and I WON'T be so reasonable. I know she won't like getting a telling off from her ex-husband but that's tough. She'll just have to deal with it. When will she be back?" "I don't know," I said, "Soon, I hope. She's taken her overnight bag so I guess she's sleeping over somewhere. I really don't know where. She hasn't said anything to me and she hasn't left a note." "Oh, dear," said Tinsley, "Sounds like you're in the dog house. You know what, Warm? You wanna do yourself a favour and get your hands on a REAL woman; not some f*cking crazy b*tch who's off her head." I didn't say anything. I felt annoyed with myself for not standing up to Tinsley, but he really is a scary guy, and I didn't want to do or say anything that would end up with him chucking me into The Hive. To be honest, I just wanted him to leave. "My God, you're a f*cking p*ssy," said Tinsley. Minnie then wondered into the hallway, looked up at Tinsley and gave him a vicious hiss. It was kind of nice not to be the only person Minnie hated. Tinsley frowned at Minnie and in a very loud and scary tone of voice, he shouted "F*CK OFF CAT!" Minnie gave a terrifying yelp and ran off into the kitchen. I have never seen her so scared. "If Nikki comes back and I haven't seen her, tell her that I will be having a word with her," said Tinsley. I nodded and Tinsley left. He really is an intense and scary bloke to be around.

I'm sat on the sofa now watching the DVD of 'Love Actually' (sh*t film) and eating Nikki's homemade chicken pie that was in the fridge. Tastes a bit weird but it'll do. I can't be arsed cooking. I'm fed up and I'm p*ssed off, and if that evil cat keeps giving me daggers, I'm going to whack it over the head with the old Yellow Pages that we've got under the stairs.

God knows what's going to happen when Tinsley catches up with Nikki. I can't imagine it's going to be a pleasant exchange, not just because of Nikki fighting with Naomi and trashing Sails Café, but because of her history with the psycho Acting Commander...