We had gone inside were Seb and Mackie were hanging out in the living room... Chris had gone to get changed and i walked to my temporary office and loaded the pictures up on to it... I smiled as the first ones were awkward... You would think they would be used to it by now but especially Chris always needed some time to relax and get into it... But when he does... Damn...
I smile at the goofy photos of the 3 of them... Mackie was goofing off and Seb and Chris were in tears doubling over laughing. I was natural... Chris had introduced him to me a few months ago as he was going to fulfill a role in this Marvel movie... Chris had worked with him before on a movie and they became fast friends... It was not a surprise to me they were both idiots sometimes but i really liked Mackie... I smiled and there was a knock on the door... I looked up and smiled as Mackie was standing in the doorway. "What's up?" I asked and he smiled walking in... "I should be asking you that..." He said sitting down opposite from me and i sighed... "I am fine Anthony..." I whisper and i sigh again...
"Tell that to your face..." He says and i look at him shocked... "Calm down because of the sad eyes Ava... Not the bruises... Although they dont help..." He said and i sighed again starting to feel like a balloon that is losing air... "Anthony i dont want to talk about it..." I whisper and now he sighs... "Can i show you something...?" He asks and i nod... I am confused when he asks if i put the photos on the laptop and i nod... He stands up takes the chair and walks around and sits down beside me.
"I noticed something... During our little photoshoot... Which i want copies from by the way..." He says and i chuckle... "Of course... You want to..." I say and he chuckles... "I put myself in a tux for you... You better give me a copy of me looking good..." Mackie said and i chuckled again... "I'll make sure i will sent them to you." I said and he smirked... He pulled up a picture and i had no idea where he was going with this...
"What do you see?" He asks and i look confused again... "You, Seb and Chris..." I say not getting what he wants me to see... "Look at Chris..." He says and i blush... "What am i supposed to see?" I ask not getting it... "Look at the eyes...?" He says and i sigh... "He is looking at the lens..." I say and Mackie shakes his head and shows me a photo of Chris on his phone...
"A picture... Taken by another photographer... Look at the eyes..." He says and i sigh... "Mackie that proofs nothing..." I mumble and he rolls his eyes. "Really..." He says and goes through every picture i had taken and i had to admit even when he was goofing off with Seb and Mackie he was looking at the lens... I dont know why i hadn't noticed.
"That man loves you... And i know he fucked up... He is an idiot... He fucked up a lot he knows that... But i know one thing for sure he always talks about you. Thinks about you every day and if he has the chance to make you smile, he will take it even if it makes a total fool out of him... I know it might take time but i just wanted you to know." He says and i sigh... "What if he gets sick of me... I dont want to be tossed aside... I dont think i can survive that..." I whisper and Anthony sighs... "You dont know until you try... And no one can give you the guarantee of forever Ava..." He says smiling at me and i sigh...
"Just think about it..." He says standing up... "And when he does hurt you again, we will kick his ass..." Mackie says smirking and i chuckle... Mackie walks out and i sigh and go over the pictures again and now i can't un see it... I smile looking at the pictures and i work on them for a bit, changing background just having fun with it... But my mind is thinking about what i heard this morning and what Mackie talked to me about...
The pull Chris has on me is strong, but my fear is strong to... I know what i heard this morning and the fact that Chris is not pushing anything and just acts friendly with the occasional hug and comforting kiss on my head is nice... I have to admit when we hug i feel calm and when he lets me go i feel a bit sad because the comfortable feeling disappears immediately... But will that all change as soon as i give in... Mackie is right you dont know until you try, and no one can promise you forever but the thought of having him and then losing him is paralyzing...
There is another knock on the door and i look up and smile... "Hey..." Chris says and i wave him over... He sits down next to me in the chair Mackie had left there and i show him the photos... "This one is one of my favorites..." I say and i show him the picture of him and Seb doubled over laughing over something Mackie said... Chris chuckles and lay my head on his shoulder as i go through the others with him... We sit there in silence just going through the photos...
"I am trying..." I whisper breaking the silence and i can feel him smile as he kisses the top of my head. "I just need to take things slow..." I whisper and he takes in a deep breath... "I can do slow... I can live with that..." He whispers back at me and i smile and lift my head looking at him and he smiles back at me running his hand through my hair...
