Elephant Reviews [CFCU]

Princess of Aerlion

By: perdida_princesa19

First Impressions (ex. Cover, blurb, title)

-Title: The title works with the plot of the story so far.

-Cover: The cover is fitting and attractive. However, the font of the title might benefit from a little change, or maybe some contrast.

-Blurb: The blurb covers the important points.

Mechanics (ex. Grammar, sentence structure, etc.)

-A couple errors were noticed here or there, but nothing too distracting.

-The sentences are a little choppy, so perhaps some combining is in order, or varying up the sentence lengths.

-There seems to be a lot of exposition.

Plot

-It was a little confusing on how the inheriting the throne worked, so maybe it would be good to have more explanation or background about those laws.

Characters

-Perhaps more reactions from the characters, more emotions or descriptions of physical feelings.

-There could be more body language included to help the reader connect with the scene and characters. 

There are a few things to maybe add or tweak, but overall, it's not bad. You have a great start, and an interesting plot going on. Good luck with your writing journey!