Elephant Reviews [CFCU]

The Untainted

By: SueTea

First Impressions (ex. Cover, blurb, title)

-Title: The title is good.

-Cover: The cover seems fitting. The only comment would be that the author's name is a little difficult to read because of the size.

-Blurb: The blurb feels a little confusing, as the sentences are very long and have interludes that makes it easy to get lost.

Mechanics (ex. Grammar, sentence structure, etc.)

The grammar is pretty spotless.

Plot

- Oliver the Thumb is used several times before it is clarified who that is or how they got the nickname, so it is confusing for a while. A suggestion would be to explain the nickname after the first time it is used so the reader doesn't have to figure it out later.

- The timeline seems to be a bit all over the place, so it's hard to keep track of what's happening now and what's happened in the past.

Characters

It's a little difficult to picture some of the characters exactly:

- The teacher seems to be in the same generation as the student, Catherine, which is not usual. Usually the teacher is older than the students in a high school, older by at least the amount of school one usually needs to complete before becoming a teacher.

- Mr. Wilkins is described as a crazy old hoot but then it is said he was a powerful man in the mafia, which feels a little disjoint. 

You definitely got the creepy obsession personality done well, it will be interesting to see where it goes. Best of luck in your writing journey!