Elephant Reviews [CFCU]

Juniper

By uniquely_me14

First Impressions (ex. Cover, blurb, title)

-Title: The title is fine.

-Cover: The cover is okay.

-Blurb: The blurb can be tightened up a little. One suggestion is to move the questions to the end and explaining the magic system a little more.

Mechanics (ex. Grammar, sentence structure, etc.)

A couple minor edits are needed, but nothing major.

Plot & Character 

- The story starts off on waking up and training, which isn't a particularly attention-grabbing hook.

- In Chapter 2, it seemed like she hadn't seen her parents for a long time but the reunion did not consist of much emotion or reaction. If she wasn't expecting that kind of a greeting, perhaps have her mention something about how it wasn't something that was normal.

- In Chapter 11, describe ship better, visually. Also, how does traveling between realms work?

This story seems to be an exciting adventure. We wish you the best of luck to you and your writing journey!