Elephant Reviews [CFCU]

The Treehouse

By: hchladybug1218

First Impressions (ex. Cover, blurb, title) 

Title: The title is fine.

Cover: The cover is okay.

Blurb: The blurb works.

Mechanics (ex. Grammar, sentence structure, etc.)

There are little to no errors.

Plot & Characters:

- The main character is hard to like. He seems to act like he is above everyone else and there is a lot of negativity in his personality.

- The prose is written well, it is easy to read and it flows nicely.

- The first chapter has a lot of exposition and background about the main character's family and life, which is informative but is not an engaging hook.

- There is a bit of confusion when it comes to Veronica's nickname, Ronnie because throughout the chapters, she is referred to by Ronnie and Veronica, so it sometimes sounds like it is two different people. This can be perhaps remedied by mentioning that her full name is Veronica once, (and that her nickname is Ronnie) and then from that point forward just referring to her as Ronnie, both in the narration and in the dialogue.

This seems like a nice teen fiction about emotions and grief. Best of luck to you in your writing journey!