Elephant Reviews [CFCU]

Fyre

By: thisisean

First Impressions (ex. Cover, blurb, title)

-Cover: The cover is nice but it is hard to read the text at the bottom and the sticker.

-Blurb: The blurb is fine.

-Title: The title looks good.

Mechanics (ex. Grammar, sentence structure, etc.)

There are some grammar issues to take a look at, but it is noted that the story is still under editing.

Plot & Characters

- There's a bit of a casual info dump in the first chapter mixed in with the action, which makes it a bit confusing to follow the energy while also trying to learn about the world.

- A bit more character setup might be helpful as well to introduce readers to the world and engage them in the narrative.

- Perhaps one of the most notable things mentioned in the first chapter was the fact that the MC is a satyr but it isn't really explained much.

- One part of the first chapter that felt a little confusing was to what happened immediately after the dragon was killed. Was he flying and did he fall from a great height? If so, how did the MC survive the fall?

- The character narrations are a bit peculiar because it's unclear whether he's always been half goat, if he's part of a minority group, etc and the way he brings it up seems like he's a bit too self-aware. He also keeps mentioning that he's not human to drive home the point that he's not human.

- The plot can use a bit more clarification in direction. At some point, they meet a duke but it is unclear as to the purpose of the meeting. If this explains the purpose of the adventure, perhaps consider putting it at the beginning and skipping the dragon chase scene.

- The chapters end on a kind of neutral note. Perhaps try a more inciting incident or cliffhanger-like ending for the chapters to really entice the readers to go on. 

This seems like an interesting story. We wish you the best of luck to you in your writing journey!