Elephant Reviews [CFCU]

Rough Waves

By: shellzels

First Impressions (ex. Cover, blurb, title)

-Title: The title is good.

-Cover: The cover is fine.

-Blurb: The blurb is okay, but perhaps it would be even better without the exclamation points.

Mechanics (ex. Grammar, sentence structure, etc.)

There are a couple of grammar mistakes here and there, so perhaps giving it a good read-through or using a text-to-speech program might help catch the errors.

Plot & Characters

- Give more introductions to the characters so we can understand who everyone is.

- The pacing seems a little quick in some areas, as events seem to move on relatively quickly, such as Maddie's developing relationship with Skylar.

- Instead of using parentheses in chapter 6 to add what Maddie is thinking after she says that she didn't get much sleep, perhaps it can in italics with narration. It would look something like this: "Don't mind me, I didn't get much sleep last night..." thinking about you and your girlfriend having sex I added, in my head.

The writing is comprehensive for the most part, and it's a nice story. Best of luck with your writing journey!