Stupid Supergirl AU's

Back In Diapers (DC X Marvel)

"J'oOonn, Kawa keeps steawing my guwns!!" Alex yelled at J'onn.
"Oh dear god not another one of these chapters." J'onn rolled his eyes and rubbed his temples. He sighed heavily and picked up Alex, putting her on the couch. "Sit there and behave. I will go get Kar-"
"Hewwo? Anyone here?" Asked an unfamiliar voice.
"Who are wou?" Alex asked, she climbed down from the couch. "I am Diwrector Danfers of the DEO. Who are wou and what are wou doing here?"
"I'm Cawol Danfers. Stwange ac-ci-dent-alwy opened a portal from my world to wours. Fis is Natasha." She looked up at the adult behind her.
"Natasha Romanoff. I take it you're the responsible adult." Natasha shook J'onn's hand.
"I don't understand why the writer would do this to us." J'onn seemed be almost in tears by this point. "I AM NOT ALMOST IN TEARS YOU GYPSIE!" He tried to yell at me. But I'm just going to go ahead and erase his dialogue.
"Okay well, that aside, we need your help. I love Carol but if I have to change her one more time, I'm going to-"
"Wou're not gowing to wike fis Nat..." Carol looked down at herself.
"What did you do?"
"Awex darwed me to twy to wuse my powers. And I put a hole frough the wall."
"Carol!"
"And I pooped again." Carol said quietly.
"How many times do you have to shit?! I just changed you!"
"Sowwy." Carol pouted, "I cawnt help it."
"I should've left you with Wanda." Nat picked up Carol, "I'll be back."
"Booobs." Carol mumbled, smiling to herself.
Alex ran after Nat, still trying to assert herself as the boss.
"Kawa, we hafe fisitors!" Alex called her sister over.
Kara flew full speed towards them. Which caused Lena to attempt to run after her.
"Kara, slow down! You're going to-"
Kara lost control of herself and flew straight into a trash can. Lena tried to hide her laughter, meanwhile Carol was still fixated on Natasha's boobs.
Lena turned to Brainy, "How's Nia holding up?"
"All she does is eat and sleep. I think there's something wrong with her." He said, cradling her in his arms. She was peacefully asleep, sucking on her own thumb.
"She's a toddler. There's nothing wrong with her." Wanda smiled softly.
"Wanda, take Carol. She just keeps trying to grab my boobs." Nat handed Carol over. As soon as Carol realised she was being passed over, she flew back into Nat's arms.
"No. Me want boobs!" Carol exclaimed.
"Carol you are literally three right now. You can't be trying to grab my boobs." Nat sighed.
"We should introduce ourselves. I'm Wanda, Carol is the child we're trying to turn back, and Natasha is the one holding her. And this well behaved one is Darcy."
"I'm Lena Luthor-"
"Wait! FE Lena Lufor?!" Darcy exclaimed. "I wead abowt wou!"
"You did?" Lena asked.
"Weah, in a comic bowk!"
"Darcy, not now. We have to turn you ba-" Wanda was cut off by Carol.
"Boobs!"
"Wena, can wou help me out of fe trawsh?" Kara's voice was muffled.
"Can wou leafe her in there for a bit wonger? She was steawing my guwns." Alex requested.
"Awex! I can hear wou!" Kara yelled.
"Your poor parents." Lena rubbed her temples.
Lena lifted Kara out of the trash.
"Do you guys have a change table?" Wanda asked, gesturing to Carol.
"We didn't until the first time this happened." J'onn sighed, "Now there's one in every bathroom."
"I'm going to put Nia in her crib." Brainy walked off with Nia.
"I wanna pway wif her frough!" Kara complained.
"Kara, Nia is sleeping. You have to let her sleep." Lena argued.
"How come Cawol can gwab Nat's boobs but wou say I cawnt touch wours?" Kara asked Lena sadly.
"Kara! This is not the time and that is inappropriate! Go to your room!" Lens disciplined.
"See what you've caused?" Nat said to Carol. "Once Wanda changes you, you can follow Kara to her room. Time out for both of you." Nat also disciplined.
"Fiwne!" Carol and Kara jinxed, walking off together. Wanda following behind them.
"I'm going to kill Natasha." Wanda said, thinking about changing Carol again.
Darcy smiled at Alex, "vat do wou do for fun here?"
"I'll show wou!" Alex pulled Darcy into the weapons room, "GUWNS!" She yelled excitedly.
"Fhat sewms dangerwous." Darcy said.
"KELLY, SHE'S IN THE WEAPONS ROON AGAIN!" J'onn yelled through the P.A system.
Kelly ran into the weapons room, "Oh no. Not this again. I'm a therapist, I shouldn't need therapy."
"Kewwy!" Alex smiled happily, nudging Darcy, "Fhat's my wife."
"She's pwetty!" Darcy smiled, "I'm Darcy Wewis." Darcy introduced herself.
"Kelly Olsen. Nice to meet you. Who is your responsible adult?" Kelly asked.
"Wanda! But she's changing Cawol." Darcy informed Kelly.
"Wait. Wanda as in Wandavision?" Kelly raised an eyebrow, "Oh no, I did not get my degree for this. Sorry J'onn, but I'm not sticking around for Wanda's trauma too." Kelly picked up Alex and Darcy. She walked out, putting Darcy the couch beside Lena.
"I wanna stay!" Alex yelled.
"We're going home Alex. That's final." Kelly rolled her eyes.
"NO SEX FOWR A WEEK AFTER I TUWRN BACK IFF WOU TAKE ME HOWME!"
"We won't be having sex until I get this situation out of my head." Kelly told Alex.
"I can help with that." Wanda interrupted.
"No thanks, I prefer therapy."
"Where are the blondes?" J'onn asked.
"Oh no." Kelly looked around.
"Oh no." Lena gasped.
"Oh no." Wanda said.
"Oh fuck!" Nat exclaimed.
"Wou left two idiot blowndes awone togever!" Alex laughed.
All the idiots rushed to Kara's room, seeing Kara on fire.
"I told wou, I'm in-de-stwruck-able." Kara sighed.
"Efen my powers won't huwrt?" Carol questioned.
"Carol! Stop trying to kill Kara!" Nat grabbed her, picking her up.
"But she was gowing to eat a gwenade neft!" Carol pulled against Nat's grip.
"No! Carol no!"
"Kara! What were you thinking?!" Lena used a fire extinguisher to put out Kara, "You were wrapped in my good shirt!"

Author's note:
I apologise for my absence. I've been super busy with work and my studies. I will be posting a part 2 to this soon.
Thank you guys for continuing to read this. Make sure to comment/vote so I know the kind of chapters you guys want to read more of.
- Mightnotbeawriter