Stupid Supergirl AU's

Kelly & Kid Lori

"Alex, where are you going? You have to help me babysit Lorelei." Kelly crossed her arms as her wife neared the door.
"Kara asked me to do them a favour, and I'm going. You'll be fine. You've got this." Alex dismissed Kelly's concern.
"She's a Kryptonian child." Kelly pointed out, "She can bench press me with one finger. How am I supposed to-"
"If she acts up, do what Lena does and spray her with the hose." Alex shrugged.
"Lena sprays her with a hose?"
"Only when they're outside and Lena's trying to water the garden, but Lori keeps getting in the way." Alex replied.
"Oh my lord, I'll have to bring that up tomorrow in therapy." Kelly made a note of it.
"I'll see you later." Alex kissed her cheek and left.

Kelly turned around to see Lori, dressed in a Batwoman costume, playing with a toy and eating a banana.
"So it's just me and you."
Lori looked up at Kelly, "This is yummy!"
"Well, you're definitely a Danvers." Kelly giggled.

~Two Hours Later~

Lori was cuddled into Kelly's side. The excited little kid was watching Scooby-Doo. But like, the old episodes. The good episodes. Not the new shitty episodes. Like what the actual fuck Cartoon Network?! Why'd you have to ruin Scooby-Doo like that? Anyway, now that I've voiced what we're all thinking, Kelly looked down at Lorelei.
"This is what you like to watch?"
"Ya-huh!" Lorelei answered, "Aunt Nia has all the dvds and makes me watch them."
"Cartoon buddies?" Kelly looked at the television, "So she's replaced Kara? That explains why Kara cries every time she talks about Spongebob."
"No, mama's just really busy, so she doesn't watch it with us anymore. Mommy watched it twice but she kept ruining it. She kept pointing out how there's no logic. Mommy doesn't like cartoons." Lorelei explained.
"That does sound like Lena."

~Ten Minutes Later~

"It's obviously the janitor!" Kelly gestured to the tv.
"No, it's the boss man! It's always the billionaire." Lorelei argued.
"But, he's so suspicious."
"It's what they do. They make a sus character to throw you off." Lorelei explained, "I thought you were smart."
Kelly looked down at the child sitting in her lap, "What? You think I'm smart?"
"If I could choose one person to be, I'd pick you." Lorelei leaned back so her head was against Kelly's chest, "You're so strong, the shield is awesome, and you're not mommy smart, but you're smart. Plus you take care of us. You're the most important Superfriend."
Kelly smiled softly, "Do you want to see the shield?"
Lori sprung off the couch, "Yes please!"
"Okay, follow me." Kelly guided Lori to the backyard, where her and Lori could be heard playing by the neighbours.

"Guardian! I need help!" Lori yelled dramatically.
"I've got you, Batwoman!" Kelly yelled one reply, she pretended to fight bad guys, which were just some empty boxes Lorelei had placed around. Kelly freed Lorelei, who jumped off the swing set Alex had put in the backyard for the kids.
"Thank you Guardian." Lorelei went back to pretending to beat up the boxes and any trees that were in the yard.
"You're welcome Batwoman." Kelly replied, pretending to shield Lori from a gun shot.

They were joined by Nia, then Kara, then Alex, then Brainy, then Jess. Until most of the Superfriends were playing with them. Mon-El, J'onn, Winn, Jess, Sam and Ruby played the bad guys. Meanwhile, Brainy struggled grasping the concept of role playing, but Nia and Lori didn't stop trying to explain it to him.
As for Lena, she sat on the back patio, watching them. She kept her book firmly in her hands, despite almost being hit by a flying box.
"Quick! It's night time, we must build a fort!" Lori yelled to everyone. The adults agreed with Lori's idea and began gathering as many boxes as they could find. Kara, J'onn and Mon-El even flew off to find more. Which they did, and they did multiple trips. They all ended up in full cardboard armour, and even had cardboard weapons.
Lori rushed to Lena, "Mommy, mommy."
"What is it Lori?" Lena asked, finally placing her book in the table.
Lori placed a poorly made crown on Lena's head, "You're the queen, and you have to play with us now."
Lena looked up to see the adults all still in the places. All starring at her. Winn and Mon-El crouching beside each other, a bunch of cardboard and sticky tape at their feet. Sam and Ruby standing with Kelly and Brainy as they guarded the castle. Alex and Nia standing, interrupted from a fake sword fight. J'onn laying on the ground, slain by Lori's imaginary dragon. But everyone was still, looking at Lena, hoping the person who hates playing imaginary, would give in for her child.
"That makes you a princess, and Kara my queen." Lena stood up, walking towards Kara.
"My queen, I am but your head guard." Kara knelt before Lena.
"Kara Zor-El of Krypton," Lena made Kara stand, "Marry me." Lena went quiet, upon realising that she was playing pretend, "Again."
Lori screamed out of excitement, "Yayyy I get to watch my moms get married!"

Yes the end was a nod to the If We Met Back Then chapter.