ROSES (Oli Sykes Fan Fiction) COMPLETE

HUNTED

After the news of Oli's relationship, I took a turn for the worse and I was feeling really unwell; constant headaches, racing heartrate, weak, tired... generally just flat. I assumed it was just depression mixing with the affects of pregnancy, so I decided to just put up with it until my next Doctor's appointment that was a couple of weeks away. Cassidy tried to make me see a Doctor when I almost fainted one day and begged me to speak to a psychologist, but I couldn't. I just couldn't face having to talk about it all again. 

My belly was getting so big; there was really no way to hide it anymore and it was getting warmer so hoodies were getting ridiculous, but I still wore them whenever I left our apartment. I was ashamed of being pregnant, and I was afraid of people asking questions so I hid it as much as possible.

Cassidy took the day off work to drive me to the Doctor's for my 6-month check up a few weeks later. She did things like that to make sure I didn't have to do anything alone, to make sure I felt supported. She was a great friend, but it was hard to be excited about an appointment to talk about the baby. I really didn't want to go. 

During the ultrasound the nurse asked if I wanted to know the sex of the baby. I didn't, in fact I didn't even really want to look at the monitor to see it, so I said no. I guess I didn't care. It was incredibly daunting to see what looked like a fully-formed tiny human, but I could tell Cassidy was excited by what she saw. She had been the entire time I'd been pregnant, but I doubt she would have been if she were in my shoes. 

The nurse seemed a little concerned as she pressed the scanner wand against my stomach, saying that the baby seemed to be more active than normal. I didn't know what that meant, but she asked me if I'd been having any issues with pain or energy levels. I told her about the headaches and tiredness and she decided to run some tests. Considering my luck, they were bound to come back with some kind of problem. I was a complete disaster, after all.

I was called back the following day to discuss my test results and even though I didn't really want the baby, it still scared me that they called me back so quickly. A Doctor came to speak with me and told me I had a condition called 'pre-eclampsia', which in simple terms meant that I had high blood pressure. The Doctor asked me if I was stressed and I actually laughed out loud. He had no fucking idea. The only thing in my life that wasn't a disaster and gave me any relief from constant stress was Cassidy. The Doctor explained that I needed to try to reduce my stress because it could lead to premature birth, slow development and birth complications. Even miscarriage. I wanted to follow his advice, but that was easier said than done. Between Oli's perfect life that broke my heart, Jayce's threats and the entire situation of being pregnant to some fucking criminal, stress wasn't something I could avoid. I didn't even have Uni to distract me! Cassidy signed us up for some pre-natal meditation class and tried her best to help me chill out, but my compliance was always just a mask. I was scared and upset all the time, crying myself to sleep almost every.

March 21 seemed like an ordinary day other than it was the first day I attended a pre-natal meditation class with Cass to try and help my stress levels. I actually felt a little bit better afterwards and once we got home I laid on the couch with Cassidy to watch a movie; her idea of a 'chilled out' night. We watched a kids movie so there was no stressful dialogue or love plots that would just upset me, but honestly it was boring and I found my mind wandering. My phone rang just after 6pm and I picked it up straight away, actually glad for a distraction from the movie.

"Hello?" I said, answering it.

"Willow." A deep, unfamiliar voice asked.

"Yes?" I asked. I felt  scared all of a sudden. It didn't sound like someone I knew.

"Get rid of that baby or I'll get rid of it for you." they said before the line went dead.

I dropped my phone on the floor and felt the blood rush out of my body. This couldn't be happening. Not again. "Willow?" Cassidy asked as she rushed toward me. My heart was pounding too hard and my hands trembling meanwhile Cassidy was begging me to try and stay calm and take deep breaths, but I was completely overwhelmed. My body was frozen in place until she snapped her fingers in front of my face, demanding I tell her what had happened. She wasn't saying it in a mean way, I knew she was only looking out for me, but even her tone made me feel uneasy. I managed to repeat exactly what I'd heard and she threw her arms around me as I started crying. She told me not to panic as my body shook in fear, but I couldn't help it. I was told to reduce my stress, but how was that possible when I was being threatened?!

I couldn't believe the threats had started again, and now escalated into voice calls... that wasn't just a social media profile that anyone can access from anywhere. How did they get my number?! I didn't leave the house for a week because I was too afraid to go outside. Someone had obviously seen me to know that I was pregnant and somehow acquired my phone number, and it made me completely paranoid. Did they also have my address? I went to 3 meditation classes with Cassidy, but I couldn't relax. Being shut inside a 2 bedroom apartment for days on end made me feel sicker and on top of that, Oli was only a week away from San Francisco. I felt like the world was closing in on me and I had no way to escape.

I had to go back to the Doctor's on March 30th for a check up, but Cassidy had to work. She offered to call in sick, but I insisted it was fine. It had been 9 days since the phone call and nothing else had happened anyway... of course though, I would still be incredibly careful and aware of my surroundings. My appointment was in the middle of the day and in a busy area of the city so it's not like I'd be alone or anything... I was still scared to go out, but I couldn't hide forever, so I decided to go alone. I wanted to hide my bump, so even though it wasn't cold, I still wore a baggy hoodie to keep my pregnant belly as hidden as possible. 

I headed to my appointment so the specialist could check my blood pressure and heart rate and she wasn't happy that both were still wildly elevated. I told her I was going to meditation and trying to stay calm, but it was impossible. She seemed pretty concerned about me and started talking about inducing me before my due date for the baby's safety, birth complications, even admitting me to hospital for observation. I was completely overwhelmed by everything she talked about. I still had 3 months until the baby was even due, I didn't want to be thinking about any of that stuff now. I left feeling upset and confused, angry that I couldn't relax because of other people's actions, and the weather seemed to mimic my mood; dark and stormy.

Clouds had formed and the city looked really ominous, it looked how I felt, angry, dark, sad... I thought about it as I walked but for some reason I started getting an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach. I felt awkward, unsettled... like the darkness of the city was following me, haunting me. I almost felt like I was being watched. I quickly walked to the main street where I was surrounded by people, you know - safety in numbers, but my paranoia was going crazy. My heart was racing and my breathing was panicked... I honestly think I was having a panic attack so I stopped and leaned against a wall for a moment to take a deep breath. I had just been told that my stress levels were too high. I leaned over and clutched my stomach, thinking about what the nurse said about stress and tried to breathe. I didn't want to be out there in the open for another minute so I started walking again toward the King Street tram stop; the one I had to take to get home. I kept looking around over and over as if I thought there was someone following me, but there was never anyone that looked out of place. I felt like I was going crazy. 

As I got to the tram stop, my fear of being followed was overwhelming so I turned around expecting to be face to face with a demon or something, but there was nobody; just business people going about their day, people with shopping bags and a woman standing with her young son, also waiting for a tram. I didn't know what was wrong with me. Nobody was looking at me or acting strangely. I closed my eyes and shook my head to myself, angry at myself for creating a stress that didn't even exist. It was like I was subconsciously trying to hurt the baby or something.

As I stood there with my eyes shut, someone bumped into me and I immediately tensed. I turned in fear but found a young guy in a suit who apologised like crazy, even though he hadn't hit into me hard at all. He looked completely mortified that he'd hit into me but I said it was fine and moved to the edge of the platform to wait, so I was out of the way of people walking past. I took some deep breaths and held my belly as I stood there on the busy footpath, trying to calm down, and the lady with the young son smiled at me, obviously noticing my bump. She looked so happy and carefree... part of me wished I could ask her what it was like to be a Mother, but I just forced a smile and turned back toward the street. 

As I stood there waiting, taking deep breaths to calm myself down, someone bumped into me again and I tensed, again. It wasn't a hard bump, but it didn't feel like someone walking past either. I went to turn around and see someone apologising like crazy, but a split second later, I felt an entire body, I felt hands. I felt someone push me from behind and I screamed as I saw concrete coming straight toward my face.