ROSES (Oli Sykes Fan Fiction) COMPLETE

REVELATIONS

"So, how does it feel to officially be a Father?" Mat asked once I had finished replying to Roses. Honestly, it was terrifying, overwhelming, shocking... but I was happy. "Well, it's a lot, but honestly, it's pretty amazing." I replied. I could barely believe I meant that. 
"You do remember telling me in Mexico that having a kid was your worst nightmare, right?" he questioned with a laugh. 
"I know, and I meant it but I was clearly confused. I was confused about a lot of things in Mexico." I replied without really thinking. Mat just looked at me. "Anyway, gosh, I can't believe I have a Daughter. Can you actually believe it?" I asked, wanting to change the subject before he started asking questions.
"It's pretty insane. I can honestly say that I never expected this. Do you think now that you have the results she'll get your surname now or something? It's actually pretty funny... Oli Sykes, Ivy Sykes... it's almost the same!" Mat said with a laugh as we started walking again. I had never really thought about that kind of thing... but I guess I'd have to talk to Roses about it at some stage. I guess I would like it if she had my name in some way... maybe she could have one of those hyphenated names. "I don't know, we didn't talk about anything like that, but I guess we will. I have no idea how all that legal stuff works. I mean, I have to figure out child support and everything too. There's going to be tonnes of stuff to sort out..." I said as I scratched my head.
"Well I think the first thing you need to sort out is Zoe..." Mat said seriously. "Do you think she's going to lose her shit?" he asked. Was he kidding?
"What the hell do you think?!" I quipped. Of course she was going to lose her shit. I just didn't know what she would do once she had time to let it sink in.
"Are you hoping she'll want to try and make it work?" Matt asked. Truthfully, I'd never really thought about it. I hadn't considered how Ivy would fit into that side of my life, especially not the part of my life that involved Zoe... I really hadn't thought about her at all to be honest, and I know that's a horrible thing to admit...
"I don't know. I actually have no idea what the ideal outcome of all of this is." I replied truthfully. "I do." Matt laughed. Eugh, did he really have to do this right now? I knew he would love it if I left Zoe, but I didn't want to hear his opinions. "Let me ask you a question. Do you think you'll be with her forever?" he asked cautiously.
"Who Zoe? I have no idea and I don't have the capacity to figure it out right now." I replied as we approached the hotel. "OK, well, does she make you happy?" he asked out of absolutely nowhere. What the hell? That really wasn't what I was thinking about when I'd just found out that I was 100% Ivy's father.
"I'm happy with her, yeah." I replied. Why was he always questioning me? It was like he was always against Zoe... I guess after what she did to me I couldn't blame him for being that way, but he had to leave it alone. If I had forgiven her, he had to too.
"That wasn't what I asked you..." he groaned. "Let me ask that question differently. Does she make you as happy as possible, or do you think you could be happier with someone else?" he asked as the corners of his lips curled upward. I frowned at him. I knew exactly what he was getting at... I knew what he was suggesting.
"I'm happy with Zoe right now, but I don't even know how she's going to react to this situation... she might dump me anyway, so just leave it." I said, trying to get him to ease off.
"I just want you to be happy, my friend." he replied. I knew that, but God he was annoying sometimes. 

Even though I didn't want to fuel the fire, I told Mat about how I'd apologised to Willow after Cassidy dropped the harsh truth on me about how badly Roses was affected by my actions in Mexico. I told him how she'd fallen asleep crying in my arms and how I'd held her so tightly and kissed her on the head when I left. None of it was sexual or based on a desire to get back with her or anything, but I wanted him to know I was trying to be a better version of myself with her. That I respected her and I wasn't going to be an asshole ever again. Mat had always seemed to have this protective kind of nature and friendship with Roses, and I knew he felt really bad about how things went down with her in Mexico too. He didn't say much, but he seemed genuinely upset when I told him that she'd been suicidal. I did too, the thought of that crushed me.

We went our separate ways once we were back at the hotel and I headed down to the gym to blow off steam. My mind was going crazy thinking about Ivy and Roses in San Francisco, then Zoe back in Sheffield... I didn't know how I'd got myself into this love-triangle of sorts, but I knew I didn't want to be in it. How the fuck was I going to maintain a relationship with Zoe after all of this? Did I even want to? Was she going to want to meet Ivy? Would she want to have a family with me? God, what was I thinking? I didn't want that. I almost dropped a fucking weight on my foot because I was so unfocused so I decided there was no time like the present to tell the guys about Ivy. I had to do it at sometime and it would give me more people to talk to about everything. It would also eliminate their questioning, so I messaged them to meet me in my room in half an hour. I showered and changed and I guess while Mat knew what I was about to do, the rest of the guys looked confused as they arrived and found spots to sit around my room.

"So, uh, as promised, I have some news." I stated. "Really fucking huge news that doesn't leave this room." I added. The guys all kind of looked at me and each other with confusion. "I'm serious. Nobody says a word about this to anyone." I said seriously.
"Are you going to propose to Zoe?" Lee asked.
"What?! Fuck no!" I responded automatically without even thinking. Mat laughed loudly and it was only then that I realised how awful my reaction had sounded. I didn't mean to be so harsh, but that thought was definitely not on my mind. It hadn't been since the last time we were together. "No, it's nothing like that. It's way fucking bigger than that..." I said as I thought about what I was about to tell them.
"God, you're not quitting the band are you?" Matt asked. I couldn't help but laugh.
"Oh my God, no..." I said with a chuckle.
"Come on then man, fucking spit it out." Jordan said impatiently.
"Right, well... there's not really any way to say this other than to just say it, so uhhhhh... I have a Daughter." I revealed. The look of shock that spread over every single one of their faces was intense. Their eyes were as wide as saucers, their mouths dropped open and they looked as if they'd just seen a ghost. "Are you joking?" Jordan questioned, clearly the most affected by my bombshell. "Nope. I just got the paternity results. 99.9% match." I replied. Jordan put his hand over his mouth out of shock. "Wait, I'm confused. Zoe was not pregnant last time I saw her, right?" Lee asked. I just shook my head as they all kind of looked at me with confusion.
"So... wait, what does this have to do with you saying you were staying with me?" Matt asked.
"HOLY FUCK! Zoe doesn't know, does she?!" Jordan suddenly asked loudly.
"Not yet, no. You are literally the only people who know." I replied. "Mat was the one who found out. It's a really fucking long story..." I said with an exhale.
"Wait, so... who's the Mother? Jesus Oli..." Jordan said. He looked stressed, like this situation was happening to him, it was almost funny.
"Remember Roses?" I replied.
"Roses?" Lee repeated.
"Roses as in Willow, as in girl you flew to Mexico?" Jordan asked.
"Yes. Willow – from San Francisco. I've been there the past 3 days. That's why I had to tell Zoe I was in LA with you..." I said as I looked at Matt.
"Holy fucking shit!" he replied.
"Oh Thank God! I thought it was going to be some random tour hook-up!" Jordan chimed in.
"Uhhh, she kind of was..." I replied. He shot me the weirdest look.
"No she wasn't. You guys had a great relationship. It just didn't last long because you freaked out when it got serious." he replied. The way he said that took me by surprise. Was he right? Was that exactly what happened? I guess... maybe, it was. I never really saw it through the eyes of anyone else but myself... but... maybe we did have a good relationship, albeit a short one.
"Holy shit... I cannot get my head around the thought of you being a Father..." Matt said with wide eyes as he shook his head.
"Trust me, neither can I. But anyway... her name's Ivy." I said, actually feeling a sense of pride as I reached for my phone to show them the photo Roses had sent me earlier.
"Oh, she's gorgeous!" Jordan cooed before the others all gathered around.
"Holy crap she got your eyes!" Lee laughed.
"Did you know she was pregnant all that time?" Jordan asked.
"More importantly, how the fuck are you so calm?!" Matt suddenly asked with a laugh.
"I only found out 2 weeks ago. Ivy was a week old so I got on a plane 3 days later." I explained. "And trust me when I say I wasn't calm. I completely lost my shit when I found out!" I exclaimed. I proceeded to tell them the whole story... about why Willow didn't tell me, about what she'd been through and how Mat worked it all out from Cassidy's instagram. They hung off my every word and shook their heads in dismay hearing about how she'd been attacked and almost died. It made me angry to talk about that, I wished I would have been able to protect her from everything bad that happened. In a weird way, I think all of us kind of felt the same way.

In the end, the guys congratulated me and swore to not speak a word about Ivy to anyone until I was ready and we headed off to soundcheck with the outside world none the wiser... like it was just another normal day in my 'normal' life.