ROSES (Oli Sykes Fan Fiction) COMPLETE

BAD INFLUENCE

When I returned from the toilets, Oli was sitting on the picnic rug playing with Ivy's feet and eating the popcorn we'd brought with us, occasionally throwing pieces to a duck that was hanging out near our picnic rug. "So, I guess I have now met your brother." I said as I sat down next to him. "He seems nice." I added.
"Yeah, I suppose he's alright." Oli replied with a laugh. His laughter led to him choking on the popcorn in his mouth which felt like karma for being mean to his brother. It was also what he got for talking with his mouth full! I got myself ready to feed Ivy and Oli said he would keep watch for 'pervy old men' who wanted to check out my tits. I rolled my eyes at him as he laughed like a lunatic. God he was an idiot sometimes, but I guess I liked how comfortable he must have been to be like that around me. I guess I liked that we could just be ourselves, no matter how weird. 

I handed Ivy to Oli so he could burp her while I redressed myself, and once she was asleep, he put her back into her pram. I took off my shoes, and Oli joined me in laying on the picnic rug with my shoes off and feet in the sun. We didn't say anything but he decided to nudge me with his shoulder and then laugh. What was he playing at? He did it again, then started trying to tickle my foot with his. I didn't know what he was doing, but I found it amusing. "Get your hairy legs off me!" I squealed playfully as he kept doing it. He just laughed, loudly. 

The sound of his laughter was the only thing I preferred hearing over the quiet sounds of nature in the park. It made me feel happy every time, comfortable, grateful... I really didn't know what had gotten into him though, he seemed to be in such a funny mood. We laid there both kind of laughing, then I turned my head to look at him and he was just looking at me.
"I missed this." he said.
"What? Annoying me?" I asked in amusement.
"Yeah." he said with an exhale and a smile. I guess I had too, the fun, teasing kind of way we used to interact always made life feel just a little bit less serious.

I don't know what came over me, but I rolled toward him and put my head on his chest.
"I definitely didn't miss you annoying me." I joked before looking at him to catch his reaction. He frowned and I laughed at him. "Nah, I guess I missed it too. It's nice to not always be so serious. It's nice when you're around. I don't know why, but it makes me feel a bit more normal." I said softly and way too honestly.
"Well I'm not going anywhere from now on unless you tell me to leave." he said softly. I looked up at him and just stared at him as he looked into my eyes. It was like we were reading each other, trying to find answers or truths, or unspoken words. My heart had started screaming at me to kiss him, willing me to stop fighting against what I truly wanted at that moment, but my mind was telling me to stop. There were too many consequences. I didn't want to be hurt again, I couldn't. I wouldn't survive my heart breaking again. I didn't know if I completely trusted him, but I couldn't ignore how much I wanted to risk it all to find out. 

I had never truly stopped loving Oli, I had definitely never stopped thinking about him, I just learnt to live with it, I buried it. Now that he was in my life again, though, it was impossible to ignore how good it felt to be around him. In the past, he always made me feel carefree but it was even more obvious to me now that I had so many responsibilities with Ivy. He made me feel the way I did before my life changed in the way it had, like it was OK to be silly and have fun and just be myself. To be a normal 22 year old. I hated how attracted I had become to him all over again and how much in that moment I thought about throwing all common sense out the window and just kissing him. God why did he have to be so gorgeous and funny and... eugh. 

"Is the weather usually this nice? I'm surprised it's not colder." Oli asked suddenly as he looked up to the sky. Oh God. He was asking about the weather!? Shit.

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[OLI]

Oh God, I really want to kiss her, but I can't. I know I can't. I have no right to.