ROSES (Oli Sykes Fan Fiction) COMPLETE

CUT THE AIR WITH A KNIFE

The night before I was going to meet Oli, I felt overwhelmed with anxiety and nerves. I actually cried about it, though I'm not sure if it was purely fear or something else. Seeing him again was never something I thought would happen, especially not in the circumstances I was in. I really hoped he wasn't going to lose his shit with me. I hoped he was going to at least hear me out and let me explain myself. I don't think I could handle him treating me like shit or yelling at me again. Cassidy wanted to come with me for that very reason, or to at least sit in the room spying on us to make sure he stayed in line, but she needed to stay home and take care of Ivy for me. There was no way I was taking her with me when I first met him again.

"Willlllsssssss..." I heard in the morning as Cassidy pushed my door open.
"I made you some breakfast, I'll get an outfit ready for you and do your hair and makeup when you're done." she said as she stood in the doorway. I knew she was doing all of that as a distraction, to try and keep me from focusing on my fear, but it wasn't working. 
"Hair and makeup? What for?" I replied.
"You're seeing your ex. Don't you want to look fucking fierce?" she questioned. I loved Cassidy, but she was being ridiculous.
"No. He has a girlfriend. Besides, he'd never feel anything for me, remember?" I questioned. No matter how much time passed, those words he spoke in Mexico still held so much hurt for me. I wished I didn't hold onto them, but I did. "Oh, I didn't mean I wanted you to try and win him back, fuck no! I just want you to show him how fucking hot you are... Make him see how fine you are without him." she replied. I just rolled my eyes.
"I'm not 'hot' anymore, Cass. He sure as hell will not think he's missing out on anything, no matter what I wear." I said. I didn't want him to think I was making an effort for him anyway. Cassidy frowned at me sternly. "Girl, if you put yourself down like that again, I swear I'm going to slap you..." she said as she shook her head at me.
"Well I don't want to look desperate. I don't want him to think I'm trying to impress him or something." I said.
"Alright, alright. Fair enough, but you are going to the Four Seasons. That place is fancy, you can't turn up in sweatpants." she said. She did have a point there. I ended up picking out a maxi dress and I let Cassidy do my hair and makeup in a minimal effort kind of way. It was really the first time I'd made any effort with my appearance in such a long time.

At 10:30 I gathered my things, kissed Ivy on the forehead and told Cassidy to take good care of her for me. I wasn't taking Ivy with me, not initially... I thought it was better if I could talk to him without her there first. I think being face to face with him would be hard enough, let alone with her actually in the room. I felt sick and fearful about how this was going to go, nervous and apprehensive about how I'd react to seeing Oli again... I was terrified, and I knew Cassidy could tell how nervous I was. It was hard to hide since my hands were literally trembling.
"You'll be fine Wills. He's going to be as nervous as you are, probably more since he's the one who acted like a douchebag." she said as she hugged me. I hoped she was right. "I am only a phone call away, and Willow... If he so much as looks at you the wrong way, you get up and you leave, OK? Do not take any shit from him." she stated. I nodded. I desperately hoped there would be no need for that. 

I jumped on the tram and headed to the city with my stomach knotting itself the entire time. I was so uncomfortable about being face to face with Oli again and my heart pounded as I jumped off the tram and approached the Four Seasons. I couldn't believe I was about to be face to face with Oli again. I never thought I would have to do this...

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[OLI]

Sitting there at the table waiting for Roses was agonising. Every single time a person  walked into the room, my heart twisted in my chest. I had no idea how she was going to be with me but I knew how guilty I was going to feel when I saw her. That was the worst thing. I played with the strings on my hoodie and fidgeted with everything on the table as the clock approached 11am.