Inferno Part 3

~51~ The Letter

Ellie's POV

"It's time, darlin'," Taylor says as he sits next to me on the couch.

"What a weird way to ask me for sex."

Taylor looks at me, blinks several times, and squints his eyes. "I don't understand how that mind of yours works."

"Me neither. I'm a mystery"

He kisses my cheek and clears his throat. "As I was saying...It's time."

"For?"

He silently gets in his pocket and hands me an envelope. I immediately know what it is.

"Mind your own business," I snap, throwing the envelope back at him.

"You ARE my business. I have watched you stare at this thing for weeks now. It's time to read it, Ellie Jane."

Tears sting my eyes as I shake my head fiercely. "He couldn't even call me and tell me. I'm not interested in reading about it."

"I've left it go long enough. You need to read it."

"Why are you pushing this so hard?"

"Because this is eating you alive, and I'm done watching it happen."

I rip the envelope away from him angrily and tear it open.

He brings me into his side and strokes my back gently as I start to read the last words I'll ever have from my dad.

My Dearest Eleanor,

I'm sure you have some pretty intense feelings about me right now. I hope you're not feeling guilty about having them...They're justified and deserved. I'm not going to apologize for not telling you, because I could still call you now and I'm choosing to take the easy way out. I just hope that one day you can see past it and realize how much I truly love you.

I have failed you, Ellie. Looking at your beautiful face was too hard for me to do all of the time. Your mother was my soulmate, and I ruined all of our lives. You have always been a reminder of my failures. It's not your fault, I've always known that, but my actions spoke differently.

I couldn't be who you all needed me to be. Most days I was on autopilot, just trying to keep all of us alive. When I left, I did it because I knew you guys were going to be fine. The ferocity you have inside of you is unmatched. I'm not sure where you got your fire, baby girl, but I've always been in awe of it.

You found a man that I could never be, and together you two built a life I always wanted for you. I have been silently watching you and cheering you on all of these years. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about you. There's not a moment that I have ever stopped loving you.

Please don't forget about Justin. You and Jake have each other, and I know that this won't be that hard for you. Don't forget about your brother. He loves you, he has just forgotten how to show it. This life has made his self-centered. That is, once again, on me. I introduced him to this life. Please, please don't forget about him. My greatest regret is putting a wedge between you guys so deep, that I fear he will be lost forever because of it.

I love you, my angel. I'm sorry for being such a crummy dad. I'm sorry that I'm the reason you lost your mom. You deserved so much more than what we gave you.

I'm so sorry, Ellie.

You have all of my love, now and forever. Once I get to where I'm going, I'm going to find a way to continue cheering you on silently. I love you so much and I'm beyond proud of you.

Love,

Dad

By the time I'm done, I'm crying. I just put the letter on the coffee table and cuddle into Taylor.