Ohana Reviews

Review: The 26th of February

Reviewer- kinalhariya
Book- The 26th of February
Author- Nithya2023

Blurb:

The first paragraph really pulls me in. I am already curious to know the twist behind the words and what must have happened. Those sentences were beautifully crafted too.

Instead of- Will we ever be together again?

You can write- Will we be together ever again?

Almost everything about the blurb is eye-catching but the last few lines seem abrupt. If a single line is added about something in the past(you can leave it in a mysterious way) and add the sentence...will they learn the truth about what happened to them in the past....

Overall, nice blurb. It is mysterious and keeps us wondering what is going to happen.

Prologue

It starts off really nicely. A question on love seems fitting as the story is a love story. A different kind as you claim, but still a love story :) The ending sentence was really beautiful. Nice idea of putting the word 'soul' in bold. It really highlights the meaning.

Moving towards the chapters,

I am really intrigued to see that a student escaping from the hostel has made it seem like he is escaping a jail. I am already imagining what kind of college/hostel it must be.

The description of the looks seems like it came out of nowhere. One or two sentences would have been fine but two paragraphs, it is too much and takes our attention from the story.

You have described him relaxing and thinking to put the consequences on the back of his mind. It follows with the dialogue that literally states the same thing. I would suggest  keeping only one.

The sentence- It feels like a movie. Merely a dumb movie, though....Had me laughing.

I like how the subtle hints are given about 26 of February. Like the dream and the teaching lesson and all.

Two stories in one; I am eager to see the outcome of the dreams.

The way Jenna and Nick communicate, it is so unique. Their talks are simple yet they manage to bring a smile to my face.

The photo at the end of eighth chapter...the moon, the trees making a heart, it was so beautiful. Loved it.

****

Characterization is done properly. We can distinguish them apart. Their pranks are awesome and the characters from the dreams are well developed too.

Descriptions of the surroundings are done beautifully. However, the descriptions of humans, I think it is way more detailed, making me want to skip over that part. The looks, the attitude, the most handsome part, all this would look really good if it was shown rather than just telling it.

Concept is nice. The fluctuation between the past and present through dreams, and the mystery behind what it actually entails, I am really liking it.

Plot is well written and it flows steadily. Personally I liked Nick and Jenna's part in the story more but Davian and Alayah are also interesting.

Writing style is good for the most part, but I have seen that there are many sentences which tell the same thing in a different way. It just adds words to the story. If they aren't saying anything new than the ones already said, then I would suggest cutting down those sentences.

Presentation wise, the story is beautiful. The dreams in Italics, the important words of the last lines in bold, and the beautiful pictures; everything adds to the charm of the story.

Grammar and suggestions:

Minor punctuation errors like using commas instead of full stops, extra quotation marks at some places.

There are times where two people are talking but the quotation marks are placed as if it is a single dialogue.

Eg: "first person speaking.....
       Second person speaking...."

It needs to be -
"First person speaking."
"Second person speaking."

Tenses fluctuated in some areas. The whole book is in present tense, but few sentences came out in past tense.

Space is missing in the words-
Chapter two
unveilingAnne's

Chapter three
Subjectsso.

Instead of Alayah has not invented the conversation...it should be
→Alayah has not initiated the conversation.

Instead of recounts, you can use counter backs. Just a suggestion.

Chapter eight

The dream suddenly went from Italics to normal.

Overall, it is nicely written. Just make sure to weed out the minor errors while editing.

Last words,

It is an interesting book. The concept is really hooking and for the most part it has grabbed my attention. The current version is good, but it has potential to get better. All the best.

Thanks for choosing me. Keep writing!!