Ohana Reviews

Review- In her Shadows

Reviewer- kinalhariya
Book- In her shadows
Author- 99sharks

Blurb:

Concept seems interesting. It has made me scared and intrigued for the main lead from the blurb itself. The shadows part was a nice touch and it relates to the title too. I have a feeling that the main lead will have to go through a lot in this story.

Blurb is well-written but it has the potential to be made more attractive to the readers.

Audio:

Audio is clear and sounds just right. The speed is perfect too. I know a lot of readers who prefer listening to audio books while traveling. So this might be a great option for them. Moreover, it will help with the name pronunciations.

(I am not really a fan of listening to stories. I like reading more. So I only heard the prologue. So the review for audio is based on it.)

Prologue:

From the fight with parents, to the panic attack at the party and finally breaking down at the news of her parent's demise. It was a tense chapter from start to end, yet the levels of the said tension were different and each of them connected really well.

The Dialogues were so powerful that it didn't really need an explanation about who said it in what way. The speech conveyed it well enough.

Descriptions about how she felt during the party and after she received the news were well-written. It was a perfect example of show not tell.

Just one thing: How did realization hit her before the police even said anything to her?

They could be there for any other reason. I would suggest showing something like her parents texted her about going out to find her or something. Hence, she got a bad feeling seeing the police. Or anything that suits the plot.

Moving towards the chapters,

Her condition is portrayed well. I found the part relatable where she says that even though her emotional support dog protects her, it doesn't take away all her memories.

As this is after the prologue has happened, will the readers get to know what made Sussianna change so much before the prologue? It seemed that her parents were worried about her changed behaviour. Would love to see a flashback for it.

A movie type of entry for the main leads😁.

The conflict she is feeling about Chris's ever changing behaviour is portrayed well. Even the readers could feel that. You could feel something bugging you while reading about him. He is kinda cute yet fishy.

I am getting frustrated for Sussianna here. That guy doesn't really listen. A help when it is forced and not needed is much worse. 

She does get irritated by him but at the end gives in to all his demands. Not being able to say No, or feeling extremely guilty when they somehow manage to say it, is one of the personality traits that has been shown for the main lead without telling us about it directly. Great job.

My subconscious keeps telling me, you do like him, but she doesn't know what she's talking about - hilarious line. Had a great laugh while reading it.

Camille seems like a great friend. A stark contrast to what Sussianna's parents thought about her. 

It was really funny when Camille wanted to find out what he looks like so she could go kill him later if he turns out to be a serial killer. 

The interaction/interrogation between Chris and Camille was awesome. The feeling of  getting irritated but knowing that they are just looking out for you seemed realistic.

I also enjoyed the interaction with Ms. Nelson. It was kind of cute.

Sussianna finally managed to stand her ground. Although she felt guilty about it, that was a start.

****

Characterization is done perfectly. Not only the main characters, but the supporting characters are also portrayed so well that it is easy to connect with them. Author has shown their personalities well without spelling it out.

A great work has been done with the characters, especially Chris. From cute to frustrating to suspicious, his behaviour keeps changing, but there is no hitch in-between the changes. The transitions are so smoothly done. An awesome job is done here.

Descriptions for the emotions and her breathing patterns during the nightmares were so well portrayed. 

Other descriptions(surroundings) are okay but they aren't really the highlight of the story, so that's fine. They are more needed in fantasy/science fiction books.

Plot is interesting and has been written really well. Pace of the story might seem a little slow at first glance, but it allows us to get engrossed in the emotions of characters. I liked the speed in which things are occurring.

Story flows perfectly without a hitch. There wasn't a single dull moment while reading the story. 

Grammar: 

Fluctuation of tenses. I noticed that most of the dialogue tags(says, states, pauses, etc) were in present tense. However, the other story was in past tense in earlier chapters. Although, it was rectified when it changed to present tense in the latter chapters. Past tense or present tense, both are good. But you will have to make sure to stick to any one style.

Commas should be used at the end of dialogue if 'says' or 'said' dialogue tags are used.

Commas are missing in some places. 

Chapter 5

I'm going to miss the jokes he gives me when I am working.

→the sentence sounds a little weird. I feel like another verb should be used instead of 'gives' as you don't really give jokes.

Suggestion:

Anxious is used a lot of times and for almost all characters as a dialogue tag. It feels repetitive at this point. 

I would suggest using another synonym for it sometimes or not using anything at all as dialogue conveys it well enough.

Last words,

I went through a lot of emotions while reading the story. There were night terrors, emotional trauma, cute interactions, frustration, irritation, awesome bonds, and some hilarious scenes. The book was a total package. 

Book is awesome and I enjoyed reading it. I thoroughly enjoyed the unique characters.

There are some things that I think need to be changed or rectified. Otherwise, the book is well-written.

Thanks for choosing me. Keep writing!