Ohana Reviews

Review- One came down

Reviewer- kinalhariya
Book- One came down
Author- Robin_Mcbride

Blurb:
Intriguing, unique and shortest blurb I have ever read. I like the line. I was going to suggest keeping it as an impactful start, but also add something about the story in the blurb. However, after reading the story I think the single line is perfect as the blurb. It is apt and creates a mysterious aura.

Moving towards the chapters,
Unique way to start the story. We could really feel the cute agony behind the milk going sour.

Description of the house is well written. It creates a great picture of the disheveled situation. The style of sentences starting with 'And' and letting a new fact about the broken house create a great effect.

The sad condition of the village is so intriguing. I wonder why it is like that and how it happened.

I felt my heart break a little as Henry said the name of the friend he came to visit, breaking Tumble's hope. It seemed as if one friend held on to the memory while the other forgot.

The expressions of both Henry and Tumble really bring out their personalities. Henry seems really curious about everything, while blindly following Tumble. While Tumble is shown as a guarded person, hiding behind his poker face and harsh attitude.

The bee conversation was so hilarious, especially because it was said with a serious tone.

The way the homeless talked about people feeling good about themselves after helping him. This was such a unique and relatable thought process.

The friendship which was everything for one person, meant nothing to another. This really broke my heart. I would have sympathized with Tumble if not for his last act.

*****

Characterization is done brilliantly. Both characters have distinct personalities that get connected to us.

Descriptions of the scenes are brilliant. I can imagine what is going on with vivid pictures in my mind. World building is also good. It has a mysterious aura around it while still showcasing the dreaded conditions. However, a few times there were excessive details, which made me feel like skipping the paragraphs.

I feel like there is a mystery as Henry doesn't seem to remember everything. Forgetting a few things is understandable, but not remembering anything is making me curious.

Their friendship is unique. There's harshness, but there's also care hidden.

I am still in shock. I would have never expected the end. It definitely emphasized the title.

I like how the ending was correlated to the starting.

Grammar;
There's one typo. Other than that there's no grammatical errors. Well-written story.

Last words:

Story flowed smoothly. The conversations were interesting. There wasn't much happening until the last twist, but yet I couldn't help but read everything to the last. That's how curious this story made me feel. From the start till the end, I kept making guesses about what was going on. It made me feel involved, while keeping the story so unpredictable.

Interesting and well-written story.

Thanks for choosing me. Keep writing!!