Ohana Reviews

Review- The Kingmaker

Reviewer- kinalhariya
Book- The Kingmaker
Author- YouCanCallMeCorn

Blurb:

I would suggest adding some more information in the blurb. It is too short. It does show the relevant characters and the main storyline, but it isn't enough to draw attention. Or Author can try portraying the same information in a different way that can make it more intriguing.

Moving towards the chapters,

Great opening and fantastic descriptions. I could totally imagine the condition of the girl. Words flow so smoothly. The first chapter itself is so intriguing. The way he speaks that he has seen it all, gives away to the further understanding that he has gone through so much. I like how he is able to build trust even in such a situation.

I am curious about what an eye is, and why there is so much inspection and would love to find out about it. My assumption is that it means a spy/slave, but I could be wrong as well.

The bonding of Ogiwara and Tetsuya was so beautiful. It was really heartwarming to read their interactions. Not to forget about the laughter that got included in the emotional moment. I find those the best.

What a twist!! I was on the edge when the chapter ended saying Ogiwara was going to be scourged. Great cliffhanger!!

I am really intrigued by what was told about the daughters. Would love to find out more about it.

I absolutely loved these sentences:
Were I you, I would be kinder to myself. If no one could be that for you, at least be that to yourself.

****

Characterization is done perfectly. The bonds between the characters, their emotions everything connects with the readers. They manage to keep us hooked into the story.

By the way they speak, it really sounds like it is from the historical era, giving it the perfect essence of the prince.

World building

Where descriptions of the scenes are written perfectly, the description of the world is slightly lacking. What does being an eye mean? The mention of red eyes; the meaning behind it. It is shown as something common for the prince in the new world the author has created. Difference of people with blue eyes and red eyes. A few things like this need to be explained for us to know the world a little better. Other than this, I think the whole world is described perfectly.

Plot
There aren't any plot holes. The story moves without a hitch. Pace of the story is perfect. Concept is interesting but what makes the story best is the way it is written. The words move like butter.

Grammar and vocabulary

There wasn't a single mistake I could find, not even a typo. Author also has a great command of language, especially the historic one.

Last words,

Story is interesting as well as intriguing. It isn't exactly mysterious, yet I was on edge to know what will happen next. Along with being so engrossing, it is also well written. Great work.

Thanks for choosing me. Keep writing!!