Typical South Park One Shots and Readers ATTENTIONClosed for Requests

O.S Papa Johns(Gluten-Free Ebola)

gluten crisis one shot so read if you've seen the episode gluten free ebola. Song is through the fire and flames by dragon force... I wrote this for shiz and giggles XD 

AFD

Kenny gripped the gun as he kept his aim. "Kill it, Kenny!" I shouted.  We all waited. Cartman was already crying he didn't want to see it, he didn't want to lose one of his loves. "Come on, we don't have time, pull the trigger!" I screamed. Kenny shook his head his hand falling flat. 

"I... I c-can't." He whispered. I shook my head grabbing the gun and pulling the trigger. "STAN!" He screamed in his muffled hood. I shook my head closing my eyes letting the tears fall.

"It's okay Stan, it's what was needed to be done," Kyle said putting an arm on my shoulder. I nodded wiping my tears as I walked away from the box of Eggo waffles that I had just shot. Cartman trudged towards us now, steaming mad. 

"Ass holes! Now we don't have any food!" Cartman screamed. I rolled my eyes.

"Dude! Waffles have starch, waffles have gluten! That shit will make your dick fly off!" I screamed. It didn't matter Cartman was steaming mad. I quickly dodged his fist looking down at the cold cement ground fifteen stories from us. To escape the gluten crisis we trapped ourselves on the roof of Wall-mart. This way we wouldn't get a face full of flying dicks or a mouth full of starch, we couldn't lose our dicks. Cartman broke down crying.

"I know... but I'm just so fucking hungry!" He screamed. We decided to sit on the floor. We just sat around while the whole thing blew over. Maybe this way the kids at our school would forget how pissed they were with us.  We all ignored Cartman. It was getting dark and we hadn't eaten anything all day. I couldn't help but feel bad for dad who was in a camp. 

"We have to get out of here." I heard Kyle suddenly whisper. He was trying to get Cartman's attention. "Wake up fat ass." He said then started kicking him. "Stan, we're gonna get to the first floor and hang low, wait somewhere, safe till this all blows all over." I nodded opening the door. "on three we run like hell all the way to Kenny's house." He whispered.

"But, we'll have to get past the... Papa Johns." Kenny gasped. We gulped hard.

"Yeah, but Kenny's house has the least food, meaning the least gluten..." "One..." We all got ourselves ready as Kenny held the knob. "Two..." I grit my teeth. Kenny tossed the door open and we began to run as Kyle said the last word. "three!"

In just five minutes we were out of the building. We sighed of relief but it was short lived. "Flying dicks!" Kenny said in his muffled voice. "RUN!" We didn't think twice as more bodies fell after their dicks flew off. Poor bastards, they didn't know what they were getting into when they ate that gluten. 

"Don't look at the doughnut shop!" I shouted. We quickly crossed the street trying to avoid the empty store with abandoned doughnuts waiting to be eaten. 

"Free samples of hot pockets! Look away!" Kyle said running faster. 

It took a lot of willpower to get to Kenny's house. We were tired and we wanted to sleep. We managed to sleep in Kenny's room but when midnight struck we finally realized something.

"CARTMAN!"