Natepat & Septiplier oneshots

114. Lactose Intolerant Keith

SHIP:
Klance (?)

WARNINGS:
Keith being an edgy boy who doesn't seem to care much for his health

EXTRAS:
Literally one of my favourite headcanons (this is not to be meant to be taken seriously btw)

Also I'm on my exam season and I want to dieeee

And I'm meant to be working on requests but that's taking longer than it's meant to

WORDS:
362 (this is short and meant to be stupid cause I had to write something)

_____________________

"LANCE DID YOU STEAL MY FUCKING ICE CREAM AGAIN?!"

The angry Kogane's voice echoed across the halls of the apartment the two shared together. He was hunting for the Latino who had stolen his ice cream that he'd bought to eat on a day where he felt like shit cause nothing felt better to him than suffering by eating dairy products and later puking it up - he really loved dairy products especially ice cream. Lance had betrayed him. He knew the one rule of dating Keith; don't eat his ice cream.

Now the truth was that Lance hadn't actually wanted to eat his boyfriend's ice cream but Shiro had made him out of concern for the boy's health as he knew it wasn't good for Keith to eat/drink anything with dairy and he didn't want his lil brother to get ill. He had force-fed Lance the ice cream whilst the Latino screamed and kicked not wanting to eat the icy treat. The screams that irrupted from Lance's lips had caused Keith's neighbours to call the police as they thought someone was getting murdered. So Lance wasn't home because he was in the police station trying to explain to an unamused police officer that Shiro hadn't been doing anything dodgy and had tried to force-feed him ice cream.

Keith meanwhile had found the scene of the crime where a tub of ice cream lay on the floor on its side the remains melted on the carpet. He fell to his knees looking up at the sky,

"WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME."

Lance was in trouble when he got home as Keith believed his story to the same amount that the police did.