The Slowest Burn - Bellarke

Bellarke on the Ark- Part 4

*Bellamy and Clarke find their way back to one another, both heartbroken, but there's definitely more of that to come*
***

It felt like a dream. Or a distant memory that you weren't sure happened. He could feel Octavia clinging to him, and crying, but he couldn't make himself move.

"I'm sorry." The words slipped from his mouth without his control. He felt like he was on autopilot.

"I'm so sorry, O."

They were dragged back to their cells after that. Left alone to deal with the nightmares that would surely accompany watching your mother die.

It was late by then, and all the prisoners were locked in their bedrooms. Bellamy would be alone until morning, if he survived that long.

It felt like the thin foam mattress might swallow him whole. Like if he thought about his mother for than a second he might spontaneously combust.

How did people do this? How did people feel this pain and move on? How did they survive?

Morning crept in. With no windows in his cell the only way he could count the passage of time was by the increased noise in the other cells, and the sudden assault of the bright Skybox lights.

The doors opened, and from inside his room he could see the mess hall. People came pouring in. The clock on the wall showing the time, 8am.

Bellamy couldn't make himself move, even when the guard came along to tell him to get up. The only thing that brought him to his feet was a familiar head of light blonde hair, holding a cafeteria tray.

"Clarke!" The boy jumped to his feet, running out of his cell and across the mess hall.

"Bellamy!" Clarke's eyes met his then, and she dropped her tray, taking off toward the boy.

The pair collided, pulling themselves to one another.

Bellamy could feel Clarke sobbing against him.

"Hey! No touching!" He heard a guard shout.

As much as it pained him he pulled away from the girl, and she from him.

"I thought you were dead." She cried.

"I'm not. We're not. We're okay. It's okay." He was desperate to touch her, but he knew they would fair better if they both followed the rules.

"I know you didn't tell." He admitted.

"I'm so sorry for ever thinking you would."

"It was my mom." Clarke sobbed.

"She knew this whole time. And only decided to tell because you told me. It's my fault."

"No. Clarke. It's mine. I was the one that revealed Octavia's existence to her. Then to you. It's all my fault. She's dead and it's all my fault."

"No, Octavia's okay. We're roommates." Clarke tried to reassure Bellamy, watching as he sat weakly at a table.

"I'm not talking about, Octavia." He whimpered.