Tumila na rin yung ulan at nakakaramdam na ako na giniginaw na ako. Pumasok na kami sa bahay and we were dripping wet. Medyo kinabahan pa nga ako kasi siguradong mapapagalitan kami ni Mama but I assumed na nasa kwarto na sila so I told Agnes to keep quiet and guided her papasok sa kwarto ko para makakuha kaming dalawa ng damit.
We were quietly climbing the stairs nung narinig namin na may bumukas na pinto at may naglalakad kaya bigla kaming napasandal ni Agnes sa pader para magtago at nakita namin na dumaan si Manang papuntang kusina. We both let a sigh of relief and we both laughed quietly but I shushed at her and signalled her to keep quiet. Habang nakahawak ako sa balikat ni Agnes, I looked past her shoulders to check kung nakalagpas na ba si Manang at kung hindi niya kami nakita. I pushed on Agnes's shoulder to regain my balance and when I tried to steady myself, narealize ko na we were inches away from each other and since I am one step higher than Agnes, halos magka-level na yung mukha namin.
Agnes was smiling but it was slowly fading into this toothless grin. I mirrored her expression. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero my eyes darted to her lips and I realized how chapped they were yet it looked soft. I can feel the air getting warmer and my face starts to burn. I saw the hesitation on her face pero napansin ko na papalapit na yung mukha naming dalawa.
"Hachoo!"
Sa sobrang lakas ng pagbahing ko, nauntog ako kay Agnes and I saw Agnes rub her forehead and tried to stop herself from smiling. Mukhang natalsikan ko pa nga siya ng laway. She was blushing.
"Hala sorry!"sabi ko tapos pinunasan ko yung mukha niya ng kamay ko.
Pilit namang iniiwas ni Agnes yung mukha niya. Hindi ko na napigilang matawa pero pilit ko rin tinakpan bibig niya and I shushed at her kasi baka magising namin sila Mama.
"Ngayon ata natin kailangan ng coffee."sabi ni Agnes habang iniiwas niya pa rin yung mukha niya sa kamay ko.
And ewan ko anong nangyari, may dumaan 'atang anghel. We fell silent and we stood there staring at each other. We held on to each other's gaze again and feeling ko na umiinit na naman yung paligid. Ano bang meron yung ulan at ganito yung feeling ko? I can feel Agnes's warm breath close to my fa--
"Ma'am."
I jumped and nagulat din si Agnes. Her face was bright red and I fanned my face with my fingers. I cleared my throat.
"Manang."sabi ko.
"Kailangan niyo po ba ng tuwalya?"
"Ah.. opo."sabi ni Agnes tapos bumaba siya ng hagdan at sumunod kay Manang. Paakyat na sana ako ng kwarto pero natalisod ako buti di ako tuluyang nasubsob. Nako Patricia, konting ayos. Pumasok na ako sa kwarto ko para magpalit ng damit. Ano yun Patricia? Bakit may ganon?
I dismissed the thought at kumuha na lang ako ng damit na pwedeng ipalit ni Agnes. Then I made my way ulit sa sala where she was standing. She was looking at the picture frames nung tinawag ko siya while her hair was wrapped with the towel. She just smiled at kinuha na rin yung mga damit.
Nanunuod kami ng movie ni Agnes sa sala when I realized na nakasandal pala ako sa braso niyang nakapatong sa sandalan nung sofa namin. I inched closer to Agnes at sinandal ko yung ulo ko sa balikat niya. Whatever the reason is, nung sinandal ko yung ulo ko, I felt a wave of relief. Naramdaman ko na lang na sinandal din ni Agnes yung ulo niya sa ulo ko. I smiled.
Halos patapos na yung movie when I realized na Agnes was already sleeping beside me kaya ginising ko siya. Halatang naalimpungatan siya at muntik na siyang mapatalon.
"Sorry. I fell asleep."sabi niya. I smiled.
"Ayan kasi, punta punta ka pa dito. See, you're too tired."
"You're worth it naman eh."
Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero nakaramdam ako ng kilig. Ano bang nangyayari sa 'kin?
"Pa-fall ka talaga eh 'no?"
"What? Di naman ah. But, di ko na kasalanan kung nahuhulog ka na sa 'kin."
"Ang kapal talaga ng mukha mo."sabi ko sa kanya. Ngumiti lang siya then she rubbed her eyes at napahikab siya.
"Let's go upstairs na so you could sleep."sabi ko sa kanya. "Tara na."
I don't know why but I took her hands and I led her sa kwarto ko. Kita ko sa mukha ni Agnes na nagulat siya. I mean, I could let her sleep sa guest room pero malamang mapagalitan ako pag dun ko siya pinatulog.
"Tabi tayo matutulog?"tanong niya.
"May problema ba?" Umiling siya. Humiga na rin siya sa kama. Siguro nga pagod na rin talaga siya. Nilapag ko lang yung ibang gamit ko at tumabi na rin ako sa kanya.
I can't explain how I'm feeling pero ngayon na nasa tabi ko si Agnes, I can feel my heart pounding in my chest. Or baka dahil sa kapeng ininom ko kanina. But then again, ano ba tong nararamdaman kong 'to? I feel overwhelmed and I somehow feel na I just want to come in contact with her.
I guess, tonight, I can be a little honest with myself and I can clearly say na I missed her. And beyond missing her, I can feel as if I really want to do something reckless tonight.
"Aji. Are you still up?"
"Yeah why?"sabi niya. I felt her shift her position to face me.
"I want to do something."
"Ano yu--"
Before she could finish her sentence and without hesitation, I inched closer to Agnes and kiss her on the cheeks and to save myself from all the embarassment, I held her tight. Nung yumakap ako sa kanya, I felt it again, this overwhelming feeling. I feel as if I've been craving for her embrace for days and finally, here it is. She removed her arm and properly placed it around me and she secured me into this warm hug. I can hear her heartbeat and listening to it was very calming.
I smiled and I held her tighter. I found myself blush when I felt that Agnes planted a very soft kiss on my forehead. I rested my cheeks into her chest hoping she won't let go. I can feel her warmth and I can feel her chest rising and falling in time with her breathing. This feels so peaceful. And tonight, after so many restless and tiring nights, there it is -- I finally found rest.
If anything, ayokong umalis siya. Tonight I want her here. Tonight I want Agnes for myself. Hindi ko alam kung anong nararamdaman ko, but for tonight I am sure...
I want Agnes.
