Nakaupo ako sa buhangin habang pinapanuod ko yung alon habang hawak ko yung beer ko. Somehow I just wanted to clear the air and the looming thoughts in my head. I drank then I looked at the sunset. Ang ganda talaga nung sunset and ang calming nung tunog ng alon. It does sound a bit loud kasi ang lapit ko at ang lakas niya. The wind was quite strong too but everything here is relaxing.
Naramdaman ko na tumabi sa 'kin si Agnes. She sat beside me habang may bitbit din siyang beer. She wasn't saying anything and she also just looked out at the horizon.
"What are you looking at wifey?"she said finally as she drank her beer.
"Wala. Just looking at the sunset. Kasi, I think sunsets are beautiful. It signifies closing but it's a beautiful kind of closing. I think sunsets are often overlooked."sagot ko sa kanya. We both weren't looking at each other but I felt Agnes's agreement with what I said.
"Well, everything in this world is overlooked. I mean, we don't really stop to pause and appreciate things like this. Like, look at this view. If you're living here in Elyu, you probably see this everyday."dagdag ko then I sighed.
"Naaappreciate pa kaya nila 'to? I mean, for us who's seeing it very rarely madali for us to appreciate it, but sila kayang mga taga Elyu, tingin mo, do they still fall in love with the sunset after years of having to look at it? Do they still fall in love with having to sit here by the shore and watch the sun go down? Do you think they still fall in love with something they see every day? I mean, look, it's been the same sunset for years, do you think they still fall in love with it every time?"tanong ko sa kanya.
"Siguro. I mean at some point you would still stop and look at it and think to yourself na, I still like this. Alam mo I think that's the beauty of love don't you think? Love makes you look at something and be able to see things differently every time you look. There's just some things na we don't get tired of seeing. Parang itong sunset. I mean, you would see it everyday cause it's always there but everytime you pause and take a look at it, that's when you fall in love with it a bit more."sagot niya. The sun is slowly setting and hindi na siya masyadong masakit sa mata but I think I'm still squinting.
"Minsan we look at things over and over and over and yet when we pause to stop and appreciate, that right there is a moment. When we finally see, that moment becomes the reason why we fall in love."dagdag niya. I smiled.
"Sometimes if we give something another look, sometimes we still get surprised, like seeing things for the first time and I think it is one of the best feelings in the world. To look at someone and go, you know what, I won't get tired of looking at you."dagdag niya. Agnes took another sip from her beer. There's just something about beaches and beers that makes you feel soft.
"Have you ever properly looked at someone you've known for so long and you go and say, I don't think I've seen that before? Alam mo yun? Have you ever looked at someone and say na after all this time of looking at you, I can finally see you. This person I'm looking at right now, siya na yun. I can see you now. Naramdaman mo ba yun?"tanong ni Agnes. I am not sure if she's asking me or she's just throwing out the question for herself.
"Like do you ever just go and look at a person and think na, hmm, pwede. Na antagal ko na siyang kilala pero bakit ngayon ko lang siya nakikita talaga? It's like looking at a very old friend and you suddenly get the realization na how have I managed not to have feelings for this person? Na why didn't I fall in love with you before?"dagdag niya and at that moment, nagkatinginan kaming dalawa.
We both just smiled at each other for a good few minutes. Inalis ni Agnes yung tingin niya and she looked out at the sea. I kept my eyes on her. And looking at her now made me feel as if there must be something there that wasn't there before.
Or maybe it's the setting sun on her face which gave her this yellow orange tone, her brown eyes illuminated by the sun, her hair on her face because of the wind, or how Agnes's features looked very soft in contrast with the blazing warmth of the sun and the sound of the waves crashing nearby. Moments.
And antagal ko nang tinitingnan si Agnes pero siguro nga tama siya, na sa ilang ulit na tiningnan ko siya palaging lagpasan lang yung tingin ko sa kanya. It took me a while, pero ngayon, kita na kita Agnes.
"I do."
