Criminal Minds Imagines 2

one hundred and sixty four: all you have

"spence, stop, you're being irrational right now," you said, looking at him from across the den as he just laughed, throwing his arms up into the air as the glass that was in his hand lost some of the drink inside.

"me? irrational? oh, ______, i'm the least irrational person you've ever met, and you've told me that hundreds of times. besides," he said, his eyes looking into yours as you took a small step back, even though you were across the room. "who could ever make you feel like this? certainly not anyone, which is why i know you won't leave me."

you felt your eyes get slightly foggy with tears as you shook your head.

"i don't even know you right now," you muttered before trying to rush past him to grab a go bag and stay with garcia for the night.

reid was quick to grab your wrist as he pulled you closely to him to where you could smell the whiskey on his breath as you closed your eyes.

"_____, you know more than enough information about me," he muttered lowly, causing you to open your eyes as you tried to get out of his grasp, but drunk and sad reid created a very strong reid. his hand that held the drink brought it closer to your face as you turned to look away.

"let me go," you told him. "let me go."

he shook his head, pulling you even closer.

"why would i ever let such a beautiful woman out of my sight? especially when i know that i've got her wrapped around my finger," he said, allowing your ears to pick up on his commanding and controlling tone.

you knew all of this was happening because of his emotions and the amount of alcohol in his body, but it wasn't an excuse. you needed to leave.

you managed to rip your wrist from his tight grasp, allowing you to rush to the bedroom and grab a bag after you locked the door.

reid started knocking harshly on the door, not pounding on it.

when you finished grabbing a few things, you looked around for his gun that he had as you picked it up, holding it close.

you waited for some of the knocking to stop before trying the handle and stepping out into the open cautiously.

"i'm leaving, spence. we'll talk about all of this tomorrow when you aren't wasted beyond belief," you said aloud before rushing out of the apartment and to your car where you got in after tossing your stuff in the back.

you sat staring at the apartment complex before breaking down crying.

-
the next morning at the bau, you walked cautiously into the room as you noticed reid sitting at his desk.

you let out a shaky sigh, hating what you knew you had to do.

you loved him so dearly, but last night scared you. you were genuinely frightened of what he had become when he was overly intoxicated and you weren't sure if it would happen again.

you nervously approached him, sitting down in a seat across from him as he sat up and looked at you.

"______, i need to-"

"spence, i need to-"

you both spoke at the same time before cutting off. reid motioned for you to go first as you looked away from him. you didn't want to hear the own words about to come out of your mouth.

"spence, i think we need to take a break."

he sat up quickly at that as you felt yourself breaking down internally but you couldn't show it here.

"what? what are you saying, like you'll move out or?"

you shook your head.

"a break, spence. i think we need to break up," you told him gently, carefully looking into his eyes and you could see the instant regret of everything that had occurred last night. "i'm sorry."

"_____, come on, please. i mean, i know i said some fucked up things last night, but i wasn't in my correct mental state. i wasn't thinking and you know i always am thinking," he tried to plea his case as you let some tears and cries slip out.

"you scared me last night, spence. you hurt my wrist, you said some pretty scary things. i was genuinely terrified of who you were when you became intoxicated," you explained as small cries came out from your body. "spence, i'm sorry. but i cant handle that again."

"we need to find a way to work through this. i'm not losing you this easily," he said, moving closer to you as you shook your head, scooting back in your chair from him. "______, please. you've gotta believe me. i'm a good guy, i adore you with all my heart."

you nodded, wiping your eyes as you looked up at him.

"i know you do, but last night was too much for me to handle."

with those words, you stood up to get to the case briefing as you wiped your tears. reid sat shellshocked in his chair, not moving as his heart began to break.

you were all he had.

and now you were gone.