Criminal Minds Imagines 2

forty eight: inner insecurities

"spence?" you called out in the darkness of your apartment, waiting for him to respond back to you. when he didn't immediately respond, you got up and walked over to the main living area. reid was asleep on the couch as you noticed the books and cases surrounding him. you smiled sweetly at him, taking a blanket and laying it over him.

this, however, woke him up as he suddenly sat up in a frenzy. you took a step back, purely out of surprise as you looked over at him in confusion as to why he was suddenly scared.

"spence, hey," you said softly as he looked over at you, reaching out his arms like a small, needy child. you walked over to the couch once more, sitting down and pushing yourself down onto him and into his grasp.

"what's going on?" you asked.

he held you close, his grasp tight, his muscles tense.

"i'm not sure what's scaring me, ______," he responded to you as he held you close. you rest your head in the crook of his neck as you held onto him.

"what is it about?" you asked.

"gambling," he muttered.

"spence, is this the reoccurring dream about-"

"no, no," he shook his head. "it's not the dream about me gambling away and getting kicked out. it's a different dream. it's like, i'm gambling but it's over you. and if i lose, someone else gets you. another guy."

you nodded, pressing a soft kiss to his jawline as you felt his arms lose a slight amount of tenseness they possessed earlier.

"spence, you do not have to worry about me leaving you. i'm not sure why you have that so stuck in your head that one day i'll pick up everything and leave you for another guy."

he sighed, keeping you close.

"i know you won't," he responded. "but my mind has its insecurities. it's not about us but mainly about my self worth."

"spence, i love and adore you wholeheartedly. please do not worry," you told him as you pressed another kiss to his jawline as he loosened up more. "i also can't keep kissing your jawline. you will eventually have to fall asleep because i'm about to fall asleep with you holding me."

he smiled. "you can fall asleep, angel. as long as i'm holding you, everything will be okay."

you nodded, letting loose as you fell asleep almost immediately in his warm grasp he had on you- keeping you close to his body as you held back onto him.

he smiled to himself.

he didn't need to worry anymore about his inner insecurities. you loved him and that's all that mattered.