FFXV: Growing Pains (Ignis X Reader)

Chapter 53 - Driving Lessons

The rest of the evening was a bit nerve racking for you as you tried to forget what had happened in the kitchen.  Because even though you could still feel the electricity from the exchange.  Neither you nor Noctis said anything to each other about it.  In fact he acted like nothing had happened.  You followed suit since you weren't even sure what to say anyway.  But you could tell that he was struggling with it as much as you were. Since both of you were too nervous to even sit next to each other the rest of the night.

You were almost relieved when he headed home for the night.  You felt bad about wanting him to leave.  But the thought of kissing him when you are with Ignis, bothered you even more.  You felt your heart break as you thought about it. You had cheated on him.  And not with just anyone.  But with Noctis himself.  So now even Luna was being affected and their promise that they had made to each other.

Perhaps this is why retainers are the same gender as their charge. You thought to yourself later on that night as you laid in your bed.

You couldn't seemed to fall asleep as you were curled up in your blankets as you thought about it. It brought tears to your eyes as  your heart felt crushed that you had done that to Ignis.  You never wanted to hurt him like that.  Even if it had practically been an accident, it had still happened.  And to make matters worse, you had actually really liked it at the time.  But as you laid there thinking about it, all you felt was your betrayal to Ignis. Which made you feel lower than dirt as your heart was breaking as you thought about his reaction when he found out.

Then as you laid there, your phone went off.  You grabbed it off of your night stand and saw that it was Noctis. You hung up and put the phone back down.  You really didn't want to talk to him right now.  He was one of the main reasons that you felt so bad. 

But then shortly after you hung it up, he texted you.  You picked up the phone and looked at the screen.

I'm sorry it's late.  But I can't sleep.  Are you awake?

You slightly sighed as you texted him back.  Yeah.

Can you call me so that we can talk?

I don't know.  You replied.

Please?  I don't want this in a text message.

You dropped your head for a moment as you looked at the message.  Then you sighed as you pressed the call button.  You had to agree with him on that one.  You really didn't want to talk about it through a text message either.

"Hey."  He quietly answered as he quickly picked up the phone.

"Hey."  You quietly returned.

"About tonight..."  He started to say.

"I know.  It didn't happened."  You slowly said as you felt your mouth go dry as you could feel the pain of pushing him away.  "And it can never happen again."

Noctis closed his eyes as he tried to fight off the real emotions that he was feeling.  He knew that that should have never happened and why you had said that.  But he couldn't help but feel his heart get crushed from hearing the words coming from you.  Long had he dreamed of kissing you.  But never had he imagined that it would end up this way.  But then again, could it truly end any other way?

"Yeah."  He said in a steady voice, which was in major contrast to his throat as it was tightening up to the point that it was making it difficult to breath, let alone speak.

"And we can never speak of it again."  You said as you felt your heart shatter at the very words coming out of your mouth. 

But you knew you had to say them.  You had to hear them yourself as you told him.  That was the only way to get it through to both of you.  This love could never be.  No matter how much each of you wanted it.  This love was the one true forbidden love that could never be allowed to happen.  For it was the one that would destroy several people in the process.