It was so hard with Luke on the road and missing him, but me being pregnant and Luke on the road was so much harder. Although it was good having the other boys’ wives around, I couldn’t help but miss Luke even more. It was so nerve-racking because it was our first baby and all the other boys had kids. We had been trying for over two years and I had finally gotten pregnant.
Luke was coming home in a few days, and I couldn’t be more excited. I was now a few months along and I had started showing. I didn’t pick up Luke from the airport as I wasn’t feeling well and he refused to let me pick him up.
I heard Luke’s car pull up in the driveway, I rushed over to the door swinging it open seeing Luke. “Luke! I missed you so much!” I said hugging him tightly, his arms wrapped around me. “I missed you too! How’s the baby?” Luke asked resting his hand on my belly, his eyes lit up feeling my bump. “He’s doing well.” I said, Luke grinned. “It’s a boy?”
“Yeah.” I said touching his hand on my belly. “We’re having a boy!” He said happily, he picked me up and spun me around. I laughed, I grabbed his shoulders. “Don’t do that too much, you’ll make me sick.” He chuckled putting me down, I held onto his arms. “Sorry, I’m still getting used to this.” He said gesturing to my belly, I nodded. “Me too, but it’s perfect. I still can’t believe it’s happened.” His hands gently resting on my stomach, we both stared down at my bump. “Me either, our little family.” He grinned, I leaned into him. “Come on, I made you dinner.” I said, tugging his hand.
We sat down to have dinner, he told me all about the tour and all of the shenanigans they got up to. I didn’t eat much due to my nausea, we then went to bed as jet lag was making him so tired.
Luke got into bed while I got changed for bed. “Stop for a second.” Luke said watching me move around the bedroom, I stopped and turned to face him. “Turn to the side.” He said, I did as he said. He smiled widely. “It’s so perfect.” He gasped, I went over to him and stood at the bed where he could touch me. “Come to bed, don’t just stand there.” He teased tugging on my hand. I giggled and nodded, I slid into bed beside him. “Mmm… I missed this.” He purred holding me close, his hand rubbing over my belly. “I have too, Luke go to sleep you’re tired.” I said kissing him softly, I cuddled into his side and rested my head on his shoulder. He was quietly snoring in minutes, I smiled and tried to get some sleep myself.
I was startled awake by Luke shaking my shoulder. “Y/N? Wake up? Please?” Luke pleaded in my ear. I rolled over feeling something wet under me. “What’s going on?” I asked scared, he shook his head tears in his eyes. “Are you meant to be bleeding?” He asked, I froze lifting the covers seeing blood all over the sheets. “No. Oh my god! Luke we need to get to the hospital. NOW!” I said panicked, tears filling my eyes. He quickly leapt out of bed and got some clothes on. “Can you please help me?” I groaned out, trying to sit up. He quickly ran to me and helped me up. “Y/N, what’s going on?” He asked sadly, I swallowed, I couldn’t say the words. “I can’t—” I was cut off by tears. I knew exactly what was wrong, he was gone. Our baby was gone.
Luke’s POV
The drive to hospital was agony, Y/N cried all the way over. I knew what had happened but I didn’t have the heart to say it out loud, I knew she knew. I couldn’t confirm it though. Our baby, our son was gone. I took her into emergency and they quickly took her away. My heart slammed in my chest. The doctor told me they had to perform surgery immediately. I sat in the waiting room for hours. I’d called the boys to let them know what happened.
“She’s awake.” The doctor said, his hand on my shoulder. I nodded, I followed him to recovery. “I’m really sorry Mr. Hemmings but your wife had a miscarriage. She’s still really tired and drugged. She’s been asking for you.” He said, I nodded. “Thank you doctor.” I said as he opened the door.
All the doctors and nurses left Y/N and I alone. “Luke, I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.” Y/N sobbed as I came to sit beside her bed, I shook my head. “Don’t be sorry, it’s not your fault.” I whispered, I took her hand in mine. She squeezed my hand tightly, tears ran down her face. “Luke, please sit up here with me.” She whimpered, moving over slightly to make room for me. I sat on the bed beside her. She cried so hard, “Luke! It’s all my fault. I’m a horrible woman. I can’t even give you a baby.”
“Y/N! You are not a horrible woman. I love you and we will have a baby. I will make sure of it. We are meant to have a family together.” I said, she held my arm tightly.
Y/N cried herself to sleep, the doctor told me that I could take her home the next day.
—
Y/N had been so distant the last couple of days, which I completely understood. She wouldn’t talk she would just hold onto me. It hurt me so bad to see her this way.
“I feel so empty and lost, Luke.” She mumbled, it was the first time she had spoken in days, she was sitting alone at the dining table. “I know.”
“No you don’t know!” She snapped, I let her yell at me. “I had a child growing inside me and then it died! It was my fucking fault Luke! Don’t even try to tell me it wasn’t because it was! I hate myself for it! We have been trying for two years and it finally happened and now it’s just been taken away! I can’t give you what you want! And I just want to give you a child!” She screamed standing up, I couldn’t even reply. I wrapped my arms around her shaking frame. “Y/N, it wasn’t your fault! I love you and if it isn’t time for us to have a baby then we don’t have to try for a while. I just want you to be happy again. I know it’s hard but I will do everything to make you happy. I love you too much to lose you.” I whispered into her hair, she cried softly into my chest. “I just feel so lost without him. I really want a baby with you, but can we just not try for a while?” She asked softly looking up at me, I nodded. “Whatever you need.” I whispered kissing her; she tightened her grip on me. We stood like that for ages, it was nice to have her in my arms properly again.
A/N: Okay this was sad… and kinda really shitty. Sorry guys, it was going to be good and it wasn’t… my bad… :)
~ Lucy xx
