Riverdale One Shots

Betty x her feelings

Betty POV:

Tears of god knows what leaves my eyes.
My eyes that have seen stuff, stuff you might have seen, stuff you might not.
Just let me cry.

I'm so over feeling like I don't belong in my own family, in my house.

Only last week my brother was calling me a slut and my dad laughed. But I deserve it, don't I? I've never been the perfect daughter so I don't deserve anything.

As I'm even writing this, tears are blurring my vision that I can't even see the letters I'm pushing anymore. But I deserve to cry. I don't deserve to be happy since my family keeps making me feel like shit.

Even the littlest of inconveniences they cause me make me want to break down into tears.

Everything they've done has built up so much and I never let out any emotions, no tears. I guess that's happening now.

It was only 8:40 pm as I close my eyes and tried to sleep, trying anything at this point to stop the tears that were threatening to leave my eyes.

To late I thought as I felt a tear run down my cheek.

I keep my eyes closed as only more and more tears rolled down my face.

Crying is probably the only thing keeping me alive at this point.

I'm at a point where I can't find a reason to live, but I'd never take my life. For some reason I'd just rather live a miserable life until I finally die, will things ever even get better?

I here my phone go off and hope it's one specific person, Courtney. She's an online friends I've made who I can truly open up to.

It wasn't her. Of course it wasn't.

I had friends in real life I could talk to but I have never told them about everything I deal with at home, how could I.

They wouldn't understand, they'd probably think I was joking and turn it all into a joke.

I have no one in my real life who I could talk to.

And even better yet, my grandma is coming down tomorrow. Whenever she visits she always tells me to smile, what do I have to smile for?

I'm not happy. Why do I need to keep faking that I'm happy?

I'm not happy, I haven't been for a few years now.

Every time my brother hits me, which isn't often in his defense, he doesn't get in trouble. He can hit me as much as he wants because he can get away with it.

There was even one day I was complaining to my mum and grandma about how he can get away with hitting me and my grandma has the damn audacity to say 'well video it then'.

She thinks I'm lying? That same women who is telling me to smile is assuming that I'm lying. Of course she'd take his side. She loves him more. Great, here I go again, more tears.

I'm loved the least in the family. I know it.

All I do is spend time in my room, it's where I'm less likely to be called a slut or have my mum notice how something in particular about me is looking shit. She somehow can always pick out the negatives about me.

I am not happy, I'm not okay.

Just let me cry

A/N
Is this really about Betty? Or me.... 😕