Chris pov...
"37 weeks pregnant and absolutely gorgeous..." I whisper in Lana's ears as she is making herself something to eat in the kitchen... The boot is gone, and she can walk around again... Well.... Waddle around again...
Yesterday we finally agreed on a name... It took some discussion, but we finally agreed. "Chris...?" She murmurs looking anxious and i look at her a little hesitant... "Yes?" I say and she sighs... "I... uhm... You know what never mind..." She mumbles and walks off... "Sweetheart...?" I say walking after her knowing something is on her mind for a while now but every time i asked about it, she brushed it off...
"Please tell me what is on your mind sweetheart..." I say stopping her from walking away from me and i can see she is on the verge of tears so i sit her down in one of the big chairs and sit on the coffee table in front of her...
"Please dont be mad..." She whispers and i look at her confused... "What is going on sweetheart you are scaring me a little..." I say and she takes a deep breath... "I... i dont want to give birth in the hospital..." She whispers so soft it is barely audible... "What?" I ask thinking i heard her wrong...
"I dont want to give birth in the hospital..." She says this time a little louder and i look at her confused... "I dont understand... Where else would you give birth..." I ask and she blushes... "Here at home..." She mumbles and i look at her shocked... It is not like i never heard of a home birth... But Lana giving birth here... I never even thought about it... How is that going to work... Is it safe...?
"What...?" I ask again standing up pacing back and forth... "Sweetheart... That was not the plan..." I say running my hands through my hair... "I know... Can you please sit down and let me explain..." She whispers and i sit down again on the table taking a deep breath to stay calm...
"Remember the last checkup when you had to step out to take that phone call..." She whispers and i sigh knowing we had a big fight about it afterwards because i was stupid enough to take a work call while on a doctor's appointment...
"Yes... I remember..." I mumbled still feeling a bit guilty... "Well, the doctor asked about my anxiety and suggested i look into a home birth to reduce the stress for me and that is better for the baby... He gave me some information and i looked into it... Did some research... I know it sounds scary but..." She says her voice getting softer and softer as she looks at her fingers...
"What would you need for a home birth..." I mumble and to my surprise Lana starts to rattle of a list like she memorized it... "And a midwife..." She says taking a deep breath... I nod... "But above all i need my husband to be okay with it and willing to help because it will ask more of you than in a hospital..." She whispers and i sigh... "The doctor is okay with this?" I ask and she nods...
"Even with everything that happened i have a normal safe pregnancy... Our girl is healthy... Look i am sorry i didn't bring it up earlier... But the thought of being in the hospital giving birth being vulnerable while i could be home... comfortable without nurses walking into our room pretending while just gawking at you... I want privacy and a comfortable environment... But if you really want me to go to the hospital... I will..." She says and i sigh...
I stand up and i start to pace up and down again... "What about the drugs and the risks..." I say and she looks at me... "I gave birth to Oscar without drugs... I can handle it..." She says smiling... "But Lana what if something goes wrong..." I whisper sitting down taking her hand in mine making her look at me...
"Women all over the world give birth at home Chris..." She whispers and i sigh... "Are you sure about this...?" I ask and she nods... "I am... But i need you to be on board to... I made an appointment with the doctor for tomorrow... You know so we can talk it through, and you can ask questions... I also made an appointment with a midwife after that..." She says and i look at her in shock...
"You really thought of everything..." I mumble and she blushes... "Chris i love you... I love you so much... But being in a hospital with you is no fun and i am going to be uncomfortable... I am going to be exposed... I dont want to deal with nurses walking in to catch a glimpse of you while i lay with my legs open... And no matter what they promise they can't control their people... They couldn't the last time i was there..." She says her eyes pleading with me, but she is not done yet...
"I dont want to deal with the press when we go home with our girl... Instead, i want to be here in our home... with you... as calm as i can be while pushing a baby out and have it just be an intimate moment with you and me... Well and the midwife... And i know it is short day... But...." She says rambling almost in tears and i stand up pull her up and pull her in my lap...
"Okay sweetheart... A home birth it is... But i am going to hire an ambulance to be here on standby... And i want all the information i can so i can help you the best i can..." I mumble and she chuckles with tears in her eyes cupping my face and kissing me. "Thank you... How did i get so lucky with and amazing husband like you..." She whispers leaning her forehead against mine... "Anything for you sweetheart... I love you so much... You and our little girl and Oscar..." I say rubbing her belly...
"We all love you to..." Lana says smiling and i can feel our girl kick... "See she agrees..." Lana says and i chuckle...
I have to be honest... I gave in but i am still not sure about this home birth thing... It scares the hell out of me... But seeing the panic in her eyes at the idea of giving birth in the hospital... Well i couldn't say no... She was right though as much as it pained me to admit... People kept walking into her hospital room the last time some of them didn't even hide why they were there and i can't imagine the anxiety Lana must feel having to give birth with that idea in the back of your head... So, at home without prying eyes maybe wasn't the worse idea...
Tomorrow i would just make a list with the doctor and midwife to make it as safe as possible...
