Story 476

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My story is quite pathetic really , compared to others so Ya...

It started in grade one I think or younger , I was different "ugly" in my opinion , I had warts on my eyelids , face , legs , feet and hands . There were a few girls at my school who would call me ugly , gross , disgusting. It didn't really bother me , there was one boy who I would chase around the school because he was scared of "catching" them he called me names which would result in me getting angry and chasing him. One girl I'll call her bully1 was with "future friend" bully1 was about to bully me but she needed the toilet and she told "future friend" to annoy me whilst she was gone , but she ( future friend )grabbed my wrist and ran away with me so bully1 wouldn't bully me. We ended up having so much in common , she was always the strongest out of us , we were inseparable.

In grade 3 I found another friend , friend2.

At the Start of grade 4 a lot changed , my warts went way. Future friend now friend1 was now jealous of friend2 and would yell at me and hit me for hanging out with friend 2. I was upset and would run over to friend 2 for security. Friend1 from my view was growing into a bully , she stole , lied and was really rebellious. These things seemed to reflect onto me , I'm so annoyed with myself for following her! I would stand up for her when people accused her of stealing , I lied saying she didn't. She would give me some of the "share" and to this day I wish I could return everything.

However I never wanted to get on teachers bad side , I lied a lot though. I was good at it ( mostly ) .

Grade 5. It was the same as grade 4 really , except I found things out about myself. I grew a liking for my little pony , I found some girls pretty , cute. I shook it off as something else and focused on other things , I drew a lot to. I sat next to a boy , friend1 would say I liked him and I cracked and said no. I sort of had feelings for him but not enough to say a crush. I had my eyes set on someone else but I told myself I was to ugly and forget it!

-

Friend2 was in grade6 and was about to leave primary school .

Then my grade 6 year hit , it hit me in the face with a baseball bat I swear.

Friend1 would punch me , lie , threaten me. She tried to choke me against a wall. Then I found my sharpener broke. The blade lie clearly on the desk , I scooped it up and put it in my pocket. I have heard of cutting , I swore never to do it but pain and emotions took over me one night, I reached into my pocket grabbing the blade I sliced my wrists , as much as I could before it hurt to much. I remember it to much...

Tears were dropping down my face landing on the cuts stinging my wrists , I cried feeling more worthless then dirt. I threw myself onto my bed and stayed there for around 20 mins.

The next day I refused to go to school , I was taken to school and I talked to my principle , I balled my eyes out.

The situation got worse when I went to school , I just gave up I dragged myself around giving up all will to live. I attempted suicide I was to scared to see the face of death. Friend1 found out about my cuts and told a teacher , then I went to the counsellor she made me promise not to touch my blades again, I got home and promised my dad. I didn't touch them for another few months until I started high school , I felt miserable and cut for the last time .

I found real friends who are kind and yay x3 I'm much happier now I ignore friend1 now she is no longer my friend. The only thing I'm worried about now is coming out bi to my friends hehe...

~espeonbubbles

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