Submission 882

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My bullying story was about in 5th grade at first everything was going good no bullying or none of that , then it all just started the whole class would gang up on me calling me names like "slut " which kind of confused me seeing as I wasn't nothing like that " ugly " ,"fatass" ,"piece of shit" , "worthless piece of trash" , etc . At first I wouldn't really care but as the time passed I actually started to believe it , they got what they wanted, u would start thinking to myself its true its all true , and while they would call me names I would always think to myself "its okay" ,"I'm fine " ," Your okay .. Your okay *my name* " , when I knew deep down that I wasn't okay , that I wasn't fine nothing was fine . Then as more time passed they went on to hitting me at first I would let myself but finally I gained the confidence to do something i would tell them to " fuck off assholes" or I would laugh and say thank you and when they would hit me I would push then back I remember this one boy was tackling me to the floor and I pushed him off , last pubched him in the face , elbowed him , kneed him in the stomach and balls , then I kicked him in the stomach ... He stopped hitting me after that so did everybody else but there words kept on coming and everybody else would just stand there and watch . All the words found me thinking , is my life even worth it , why , its true its all true ... * May cause possible triggering * I had found my way into self harm ... It first started as scratching myself then to cutting self with a little pin , then it moved onto a little blade it hurt yes but I felt some sort of calm ... My mom found out , it broke her , my bigger sister went through self harm to before when she was younger . My mom had felt as if she failed me so I stopped and I would cry myself to sleep . For sometime I had wanted to cut I craved to feel the pain ... I would be looking at myself in the restroom ... At my wrist . Then it all stopped when I finally stood up for myself , when I half yelled at them telling them how I felt . I didn't call them names , I didn't want to stoop down as low as them ...

Sometimes all it takes is standing up whether its standing up for your self or somebody else it would really make a difference ..... Seeing all the chapters like 800 and something breaks my heart as at how many stories of people being called name . Bullied. As to how cruel somebody could be .What has this world come to . This really is a cruel ,evil world breaking the best of us into pieces....


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